Traditional circular baked goods purveyors have worked hard to distinguish their products from the mainstream, primarily through products which offer increased frosting-to-face transfer.

Jenner Wants to be a woman: I want to be an African lion...WorldsWisestOwl.com

Saint Paul, MN – Scott and Marcie Hennings had never been to the zoo with their now 4 year old daughter Jessica.  In fact, Scott and Marcie had not been to any zoo for years themselves.  Scott recommended a family Saturday outing to the local Como Park Zoo and Conservatory.  Everyone was excited to see the big cats, rhinos, and giraffes.  With backpacks full of binoculars, sandwiches, sunglasses, and a small bottles of Bacardi, off the Hennings family went on their adventure.

I was really freaked out when I turned on my phone and found this convoluted narrative mess crawling across my screen.

Beijing air pollution is forcing residents inside and underground.

The same men who posit they are much more capable and courageous leaders have gone from running for president to running for cover from the glaring truth.

COLUMBIA, SOUTH CAROLINA (The Nil Admirari): Today, the South Carolina legislature banned the Confederate flag from state government in response to last week's racially motivated shooting at Emanuel African Methodist Episcopal Church that killed nine black churchgoers. Governor Nikki Haley praised the move, but cautioned it involved compromising with the flag's supporters who demanded all homes and businesses in South Carolina hang a visible portrait of Confederate President Jefferson Davis.

The sexy rumor this week is that lovers Kim Kardashian and Kanye West welcomed a brand new baby boy into the world.

The future of advertising has changed forever. After WPP and Snapchat launched Truffle Pig earlier this week, Omnicom and Facebook answered back with a new digital content agency of their own. The new agency, called Camel Toe, was announced yesterday at Cannes Lions and was the main topic of discussion throughout the day.

EL PASO (The Barbed Wire) - Republican front runner Donald Trump has taken a lot of heat recently for his comments that all Muslims should be kept out of the country until Congress can figure out a way to properly vet any Muslims coming in first.

Twin Falls, ID –  “We see this far too often.  A lovely family having a picnic at the park and, wham, there is a large bear to scare them off.  These bears may sit down and eat the entire picnic or even eat the family.” 

SILICON VALLEY, California (The Adobo Chronicles®) - From the Atlantic to the Pacific, from sea to shining sea, rainbow-colored filters are showing up on Facbook pages -- all in the name of marriage equality. Facebook profile photos are now sporting the colors of the gay flag. It all started soon after the U.S. Supreme Court issued…

The Department of Homeland Security is asking the public to stop spreading images of hybrid Confederate-LGBT rainbow flags.

"I just want to slip on some spandex trunks and go dancing with my new doggie friend." Kent Rugby, Hunkist

The Littlefield Police Department has acquired a 200 kiloton nuclear warhead under a Department of Defense program that distributes surplus weapons to local agencies throughout the country.

WASHINGTON (The Nil Admirari) - Republican presidential candidate Senator Ted Cruz (R-TX) announced today he wanted Jesus Christ to be the official animal of the United States instead of the bald eagle. His position quickly split the Republican Party into two camps, and the topic has already started to overshadow other issues on the campaign trail like the economy, social policy, and foreign policy.

"That's why The Queen has to practice putting her crown on. If her eyes go like that she looks really funny." Harry Zonderblurb, Psychiatrist

DAMASCUS, Syria (The Adobo Chronicles® ) - The U.S. appears to be losing some ground in the war on terror in Syria. CNN is reporting that ISIS is advancing on two fonts: Times New Roman and Arial Bold.  

Twin fences purportedly intended to protect the nation's borders with Canada and Mexico appear to be swinging inward and upward in a manner that has many residents of the nation's Southern and Midwestern states worried.

What started out as jubilation over a momentous scientific achievement soon devolved into dangerous riots after NASA’s New Horizons spacecraft flew past Pluto.