Hollywood, CA – (satireworld.com)

Actress Alyssa Milano, who has not been really relevant since starring in Charmed and Who’s the Boss, tried to reinvent her fifteen minutes of fame last week by appearing nearly topless at the Brett Kavanaugh Supreme Court Confirmation Hearings. Milano, who stated that she was there to support the female accuser (who was also seeking her fifteen minutes of fame) later admitted to just wanting to be back in the spotlight again.

Atlanta, GA (satireworld.com)

The Centers for Disease Control (C.D.C.) has contributed two billion dollars to Georgia Tech University to study the effects of drinking from a toilet on dogs. The research, to be conducted with several breeds of dogs over five years and in multiple locations, will examine the physical health of the canines, as long as any mental or emotional effects that they might receive. The World Health Organization (W.H.O.) has announced that they are going to match the funding and assist in the research with their own team of doctors.

City of Salisbury seeks to exploit novichok attacks to rebuild local economy. Local entrepreneurs set up 'Novichok Tours' and fake nerve agent attack experiences for tourists. New 'Novichok' perfume planned.

What is Drill Rap? Is it a new power tool based youth craze, or a sinister military parade inspired dance movement? UK media commentators ridiculed for ignorance of musical genre they are blaming for current wave of London youth violence.

I’m back on Medium! I’m running two journals currently… Enjoy! Give ’em a follow, and please do share anything that catches your eye! Libertarian Third Camp: Preliminary Notes By analogy with the Socialist Third Camp, the Libertarian Third Camp will…Read more New Medium Journal: Tyler’s Army! ›

There are at least two sides to a story. The client will think their version is the only true story. Don’t waste time convincing them of the truth.

Oslo, NO—The Nobel Committee’s announcement of two joint winners in physics this year triggered a huge explosion in Oslo today. The  ‘winners’, a man from the U.S. and a woman from Canada, are still missing at this hour and presumed quantumly entangled. The explosion frightened many across a huge swath of the region. Along with some seismic aftershocks the event caused Maxwell’s Demon to shave Schrodinger’s…

by Paul Lander.Making fun of the headlines today, so you don’t have to The news doesn’t need to be complicated and confusing; that’s what any new release from Microsoft is for. And, as in the case with ... Read moreRipping the Headlines Today, 10/2/18Subscribe to our monthly Humor Times magazine here, available worldwide, in print or digital format. Pick up a copy at Barnes & Noble and other stores all over the U.S.

San Francisco, CA - (satireworld.com)

California Senator Diane Feinstein (D-CA) had a recent physical and reports of the odd medical findings were leaked to FOX News. Doctors discovered she is carrying historical artifacts that she never knew she had….Prehistoric cave drawings between her breasts!

Denver, CO - (satireworld.com)

A gay pride march turned violent in Colorado yesterday when two men were beaten to death for not standing when the rainbow flag was carried past them. Travis Johnson (black heterosexual) and Jack Swanson (white heterosexual) were sitting outside their business (Johnson and Swanson Barber Shop) eating their lunch in Denver when a gay pride parade past.

82 Year-Old Abigail Pederson of Augusta Township, Ohio took another significant step into the 21st century this week when she learned how to share her vaguely racist observations on Twitter, her family reports.

On the heels of successfully renaming the “North American Free Trade Agreement” as the “United States-Mexico-Canada Agreement,” President Trump followed up today by announcing a new title for the country’s popular national anthem.

Dear Throckmorton P. Turdblossom,

I understand about you and your wife and people growing apart. I do want to know if you still communicate with her and what she thinks about your living “biblicaly” with a bunch of Dallas Cowboy Cheerleaders.

Los Angeles, CA – (satireworld.com)

The kindergarten classes at Che Guevara Elementary School (formerly Ronald Reagan Elementary School) in Los Angeles, California was arrested, along with their teacher, as each child had a plastic straw in their juice box at lunch time. The juice boxes, brought from home and purchased by their parents, were from Minute Maid, Hi-C, Juicy Juice, Capri Sun, and several other companies.

Tehran, Iran – (satireworld.com)
Iranian Ayatollah Smella Buttholla has demanded that, like Muhammad, no one is to take his picture or to draw/paint/sculpt a caricature or portrait of him. Buttholla feels that, to attempt to emulate the Isamic prophet, one must act like and be treated like the prophet.

Washington, DC – (satitreworld.com)

After the initial three allegations were revealed over a few weeks, a startling number of allegations against Supreme Court Nominee Brett Kavanaugh were revealed just today. Those allegations include:

Two weeks into all the hoopla surrounding Brett Kavanaugh's Supreme Court nomination, I have just one question. Seriously? A man who grew up during the 80s and only sexually assaulted 2 3 5 women is a bad guy? Seriously?!

I mean, really. It's time to harrumph in earnest.

Dooberville, GA – (satireworld.com)

As an almost perfect ending to what’s being called ‘Witch Hunt Wednesday,’ SatireWorld editor Bargis Tryhol has gone on public record saying that he ‘slipped the eel to’ Justice Elena Kagan back in 1982 while getting a mocha shake at a local Arbys!