The picture is the latest in a never-ending war between Corbyn and Virgin after a series of back-and-forth claims between the two parties over a picture of the Labour leader sitting on the floor of a Virgin train.
Elle Dylan – now Lee Dylan – underwent the expensive and incredibly invasive procedure last month and doesn’t regret a thing.
Each toy will look like an item found commonly around the kitchen – an oil bottle, salt ‘n’ pepper shakers, egg cups – only with a sexual twist.
Nick Grimshaw completely flipped his Mercedes 4×4 after swerving at 15mph to avoid a cat which ran into the road.
With the Conservative government promising a ‘true seven-day NHS’, staffing needs are at an all-time high. However supply is simply not meeting demand at this time.
Riker, star of the popular space documentary Star Trek: The Next Generation, has been beamed off the Starship Enterprise to face trial for his crimes. As he hasn’t technically been born yet in our timeline, these are considered future sexual offences.
At a campaign rally in Chester last night, Corbyn spoke to thousands of supporters and pledged to renationalise the knitwear industry, promising more affordable jumpers and cardigans for everyone.
‘Both our parents were vehemently opposed to our marriage,’ explained Bob, 63. ‘They said it wouldn’t last, but we were determined to prove them wrong.’
For years conspiracy theories have circulated that any drinker could easily drink as many pints of beer as they liked with no repercussions if it wasn’t for a mystical dodgy eighth pint that was loaded with evil intent. It is that pint that results in hangovers and stomach problems the next day.
The leaked file contained a passage that read: ‘We will continue to monitor Mrs Clinton’s reactions to our world. Transitioning from the other place is still clearly difficult for her even after all these years.’
Following the success of Secret Cinema, Extreme Cinema plans to take movie experience authenticity to the next level.
Ryan Topper, 31, was sat at his desk, contemplating the ultimate absurdity and meaningless of the world we all live in, when his thought pattern was disturbed by Ellie from sales telling him there was a slice of cake in the break room with his name on it.
As Phillip Schofield and Holly Willoughby opened the show a loud bang was heard off camera along with a cry of ‘I told you I’d be back, Schofield’. While Holly Willoughby was able to run to safety, Phillip Schofield was not so lucky; while one Richard Madeley pinned him down another Madeley gave him a savage beating.
With the news that Universities are now accepting more new students than ever, even some of the slightly dim ones have a chance to be weighed down by a huge debt in exchange for a certificate they will likely never use.
The man, Mark James, spends most of his time on celebrity websites and social media, criticising famous women for how they look.
Beth Stafford, 26, gave birth to a healthy baby whose gender shall be decided at a later date. But the process was so excruciatingly painful that she feels it gave her a partial glimpse into what it’s like to have man flu.
The return of weekly robotic mayhem has been greeted warmly by old fans of the show as well as new. And a guest appearance from Stephen Hawking should result in the highest rating for the show yet.
The ‘KICK ME’ sign remained on Corbyn’s back for a full hour, during which time a confused Corbyn endured several kicks up the arse from a select group of Labour MPs.
The newly moustachioed Farage claimed the British public much prefer a cool, crisp autumn to an extended summer and that Indian summers are infringing on the rights of traditional British weather.
‘I was tired of looking at the tops of students’ heads when I was trying to teach a maths lesson,’ Ms Jackson explained when asked what her motivation was for trying this technique.