I make it a rule never to argue with drunks. Not even when I'm drunk myself. But especially not when I'm sober - alcoholic intoxication impairs the ability

BATON ROUGE, Louisiana (The Adobo Chronicles) - Conceding that this is not his time to be president of the United States, Louisiana Governor Bobby (Piyush) Jindal today announced that he was suspending his campaign for the Republican presidential nomination. His campaign strategy since he ran for governor has always been to project himself as a…

MANILA, Philippines (The Adobo Chronicles) - There were only twenty world leaders  who showed up at the welcome rites for the Asia Pacific Economic Cooperation Summit Meeting Wednesday afternoon. There should have been  twenty one. Missing was U.S. President Barack Obama. In a statement explaining Obama's absence, a spokesperson for the U.S. Embassy in Manila said…

Businessmen – what a bunch of scumbags, eh? Yeah, that's right, I'm dissing businessmen, in fact, I'm being anti-business. Heresy, I know, in today's political climate, but the fact is that businessmen and their businesses are no good...

NEW YORK, New York (The Adobo Chronicles ) - A woman in Russia accidentally shot herself in the head with a gun. A Chinese tourist toppled a centuries-old sculpture at the Louvre Museum in Paris. A German pilot de-pressurized a commercial aircraft at an altitude of 29,000 feet when he opened the cockpit window. All in the…

Washington – Talks in Washington are hot and heavy about getting rid of the penny as part of the US currency.  

If we want to improve this place we call home, simply quit talking about Bobby Jindal.

Kingwood, WV – Dwayne Bozeman had a lousy day at work.  By all accounts, one of his worst ever.  Dwayne fights pesky insects for a living and takes great pride in his ability to clear the world of termites, cockroaches, and ants from innocent homeowners.  The insects won, on this day, and Dwayne was none to happy about it.

Major Tim Peake entered the Space Station with thumbs skywards even though up there skywards was downwards. But in spite of the sky confusion all went well and endless messages from the Space Station are expected in the coming six months.

WASHINGTON, D.C. (The Adobo Chronicles) - The United States Citizenship and Immigration Services (USCIS) of the Department of Homeland Security has just released the revised test questionnaire for immigrants applying for U.S. citizenship. It  is a far cry from the 100 potential questions that an immigration officer might ask a citizenship applicant.  There would only…

BINONDO, Philippines (The Adobo Chronicles) - Apparently not content on its claim over the disputed territory in the South China Sea, the Chinese government today announced it was laying claim over the oldest Chinatown in the world -- in Manila! Manila's Chinatown, located in and around the Binondo district, was established in the late 1500s. It…

BARCELONA, Spain (The Adobo Chronicles) - In 2006, the International Astronomical Union (IAU) formally defined "planet," and the new definition excluded Pluto and reclassified it as a member of the new "dwarf planet" category.  It was a move that disappointed many Plutonians. Discovered in 1930, Pluto was originally considered the ninth planet from the sun. Many…

New York City, NY – (satireworld.com)

Former First Lady, Senator, and Secretary of State verified her frigid condition to the world with her latest lawsuit. The potential Presidential candidate spilled a twenty-two degree McDonald’s milkshake in her lap and sued the fast food chain because of the burns that she suffered.

I was really freaked out when I turned on my phone and found this convoluted narrative mess crawling across my screen.

We're asking our readers to donate their unwanted adult DVDs and Videos to our annual appeal for needy perverts this Winterval. Please give generously and rest assured that your smut will go to a good home.

Washington, DC – (satireworld.com)

According to liberal pundits, national figures in the right-wing media have a puzzling habit of attacking Democratic National Committee chairwoman Debbie Wasserman-Schultz’s hair. They have coupled this with other sexist attacks…For instance, Rush Limbaugh’s description of her as “one of those women you’re happy somebody else married.”
Here's a few current comments about Frizzle-dwarf and her hair….

Newport, Rhode Island--Dave Mariucci, a 26 year-old software engineer, died Friday, only one day after being diagnosed with avian influenza, commonly known as bird flu.  Sources close to Mariucci say that friends and family never imagined that he was so big a pussy that he could be killed by a disease named after fucking birds.…

SAN FRANCISCO, California (The Adobo Chronicles ® )  - The City and County of San Francisco is trying its best to rid itself of the reputation of being one of the places in the U.S. with the most expensive rent, what with the monthly apartment rent averaging in excess of $4,000. As more and more high-rise condominiums…

Little Rock, AR – Just when you thought you had all of the simple stuff figured out, some brainy white-haired guy from a local Community College tells you that you’re wrong.  Such is the case with Dr. Brian Sloss, who teaches a variety of different classes at ‘Little Rock – Big University.’  

Albuquerque, NM – Nelson Rimsplat has been unemployed now for several months.  He was fired from his job at the Albuquerque Zoo for ‘behaviors inappropriate and not in line with the the Zoo’s image.’  For the 3 year Train Zoo Conductor, the firing has given him a sense of liberation.