Following heated discussions between administrators and students who are demanding more emotional and intellectual coddling, Yale has announced the construction of 500 padded safe spaces.
One expert is disputing presidential candidate Ben Carson’s absurd claims that he grew up poor and black -- and that he was ever a certified doctor.
One of the leaders of the University of Missouri protest group Concerned Student 1950 says that the main source of their discontent is chronic constipation.
Following outrage over the coffee giant’s decision to supplant its annual Christmas-themed snowflake paper cups with diabolical red ones, Starbucks has admitted to advancing a Satanic plot.
Faced with a mountain of debt totaling more than $18 trillion, the United States is planning to auction off a large section of the Midwest, starting with the state of Nebraska.
After nearly seven years of using an increasingly outmoded stereo system in the chamber, the U.S. House of Representatives has finally got a new speaker.
A day after announcing the lifting of the “one couple, one child" policy, Chinese officials are admitting that the move was premature and might cause a “perilous” spike in the birth rate.
Republican presidential candidate Jeb Bush has a new look that reflects his “outsiderness” and “devil-may-care attitude,” says his newly appointed campaign manager.
Once upon a Halloween, children would innocently pat flour on their cheeks, giving themselves a fun, vampire-like hue. Some youngsters would even spend their nickels and dimes on a jar of ghoulish green face paint -- the final touch in a spooky Frankenstein outfit.
President Obama reportedly locked himself in his White House bedroom after learning that Ahmed Mohamed, known in the media as ‘Clock Boy,’ is moving to Qatar.
Saying that everyone who works in the field of finance and banking deserves a living high wage, workers from New York’s financial district are striking this week in support of a $150 hourly minimum wage.
Two American bloggers have been awarded a Nobel Prize in social science for their work leading to the discovery of nanoaggressions -- tiny acts of discrimination 1000 times smaller than microaggressions and invisible to the naked eye.
Puppeteering duo Trey Parker and Matt Stone have announced that they are working on a sequel to their 2004 cult smash “Team America: World Police.”
Fearing that her popularity among young voters has fallen to a critically low point, presidential candidate Hillary Clinton has adopted a so-called “gothic” look to appeal to millennials.
The U.S. border patrol is on maximum alert tonight after warnings that Hurricane Joaquin may try to enter the United States by doubling back on its current track and sneaking across the border from Mexico.
A judge in California has ordered the clothing company American Apparel to sell off its more than 300 half-naked teenage models as part of a restructuring agreement with lenders.
In response to the hardships many refugee men face in growing and maintaining full beards, a Seattle-based organization is encouraging hipsters in the city to donate their facial hair.
Local fast-food worker Darren Grossebite, 24, who drives a beat-up 1991 Suzuki Swift, obviously has a large cock, according to onlookers familiar with the inverse correlation between the size of a man’s vehicle and his penis.
U.S. space agency NASA has discovered evidence of water on Mars, offering the surest sign yet that drinkers who eventually live on the red planet might be able to enjoy life there.
Ahmed Mohamed, the Texas youth who was suspended for bringing to class a homemade clock said to resemble a bomb, has now constructed a “fully automatic” pencil sharpener.