BarbedWireSatire

San Quentin Prison – (satireworld.com)
Yes, the judge finally had enough and sentenced Lindsay Lohan to the electric chair. Sentence to be carried out immediately.
Lindsay Lohan knew immediately something was wrong when she woke up and found the prison chaplain by her bedside. After confronting him with tears in her eyes, Chaplain Piebottom explained that she wasn’t leaving jail after all, and in fact, was being moved to death row.

Yellowstone National Park – (satireworld.com)

The popular online satire site, SatireWorld.com, has issued a written directive to its staff of seasoned humor authors warning them of writing material suitable for the LGBT community.... ‘from this day forward any persons who are gay, sorta gay, homosexuals, child perverts, upside-down gendered, trans-fatty gendered, or lesbians are banned from reading any posted satire articles on SatireWorld.’

New York City, NY – (satireworld.com)

The celebrity iCloud hacker seems to have struck again. This time releasing more humiliating photos of democratic presidential candidate Hillary Clinton, age 69, showing her dressed semi-nude and in very provocative clothing.

IOWA (The Barbed Wire) - During a CNN sponsored town hall meeting today, Hillary Clinton told the live audience that, if elected, the first thing she would do on her first day in office would be to abolish the Freedom of Information Act (FOIA). The Freedom of Information Act is a law that gives citizens the…

Hollywood, Ca – (Satireworld.com)

Pubic health officials are looking into reports that the Zika virus scare story pandemic has been sexually transmitted during intercourse with the Welsh movie star, mostly via exposure to gnat semen.

Showing his credentials as a shrewd planner, Donald Trump says he is building a colony for himself and his followers in the South American country of Guyana.

Harlem, NYC – (satireworld.com)
Taking advantage of Black History Month, socialist Bernie Saunders met with Al Sharpton in a carefully orchestrated show of black support after winning the Democratic primary election in New Hampshire.

Washington, DC – (satireworld.com)

The fallout from the recent and ongoing Veterans Administration scandal has surfaced at the White House, after White House chief of staff says President Barack Obama is “madder than hell” about reports of treatment delays at veterans’ hospitals across the country.

WASHINGTON D.C. (The Barbed Wire) - As those Americans who hold the Constitution near and dear to their hearts mourn the passing of conservative Supreme Court Justice Antonin Scalia, Democrats have already begun attacking Republicans for suggesting a delay in replacing Scalia until a new president takes office in 2017.

MYRTLE BEACH (The Barbed Wire) - At a rally for her mom, Chelsea Clinton claims she left the Baptist Church at age 6 because she disagreed with the Church's stance against abortion. Chelsea knew better and knew how misguided the church was, even at such a tender age.

Boston, MA – (satireworld.com)

Bernie Sanders(S-D-Vt) now making it possible for unemployed college graduates to kick their parents out of their homes in order to compensate for years of white privilege and oppressing their long suffering kids!

DALLAS (The Barbed Wire) - After being reported missing over 24 hours by his wife, authorities have begun a nationwide search for talk radio host Glenn Beck's mind. Beck is still around, it's just his mind that is gone.

Copacabana Bitch, Brazil – (Satireworld.com)
Oh, the angst of it all. Are scores of third trimester women’s Landing Strip brazilians really behind a babies’ PTSD pandemic? Alongside brain size defects from some bug-borne anaphylactic schmuck?

The Greek Mess
Or ‘How I Love Those Socialist Blues’

News Wire Contributor

The Socialist French drove the campaign for the Euro thinking that with a unified Europe the incessant wars that have characterized Europe for a thousand years would stop and France would once again be the dominant force in Europe and Germany would be contained. Alas the Euro-Zone had fatal flaws from the outset and instead of France becoming the dominant force in Europe it has turned out to be the Germans.

Brooklyn, NY – (satireworld.com)
Arnold Horshack is very angry that fellow Brooklynites are mistaking him for disgraced ex-congressman Anthony ‘Underpants’ Weiner (D-Jerkoff).

Weiner is receiving renewed attention ever since he announced his ‘possible’ intentions of running again for New York City mayor after recent polls have shown most voters have almost forgotten his nude photos adventure. If fact, most polled said they reallyt wanted to just forget the Brooklyn pervert

Hanoi, North Vietnam (satireworld.com)

General Vo Nguyen (Dinky dau) Giap, architect of Vietnam’s resistance against first France, than the US. died one year ago today. A national celebration of his military life was being observed across the world including the US, family members and government officials said.

RENO, NV (The Barbed Wire) - Hillary Clinton visited a top veterinarian in Reno this morning due to her incessant barking and persistent coughing fits. The Democratic front-runner was given a steroid injection, heartworm medicine, and she was due for her distemper booster. Mrs. Clinton barked at the moon during a recent campaign stop.

SOUTH CAROLINA (The Barbed Wire) - This week, CNN is hosting a unique event in the world of politics. Because of the vitriol displayed between the Republican candidates in the last GOP debate, the network is hosting a two-night, steel cage death match to whittle down the current field of six presidential hopefuls.

Vegas, NV – (satireworld.com)

Ahead of the Nevada Democratic caucuses, a group of ‘sex workers’ operating under the name Hookers for Hillary is going all in for Hillary Clinton’s campaign…touting her positions on letting her husband screw anything with a pulse and her favoring lesbian issues as contributing factors in giving their 'hole-hearted' support.

ORLANDO, FL (The Barbed Wire) - The Marco Rubio presidential campaign was rocked to its core today after the New York Times broke the shocking story that the Florida senator has received four traffic citations in the past eighteen years. Rubio and his inner circle are huddling tonight, in full damage control mode, to try and decide whether his presidential run should move forward.