Check Please!

Avatar
Humortimes

0 Following 2 Followers
Comey said just what they thought. It came as no surprise. “But do not tweet no matter what,” his lawyers did advise. So junior was the surrogate, who rolled out all the tweets as more news spread of Russiagate across the nation’s streets. The lawyer got the dates all wrong...
The news doesn’t need to be complicated and confusing; that’s what any new release from Microsoft is for. And, as in the case with anything from Microsoft, to keep the news from worrying our pretty little heads over, remember something new and equally indecipherable...
It may well be that director Miguel Artete and screenwriter Mike White have initiated a new franchise for a string of movies unlike those regarding our friend Harry Potter and more akin to our president … Donald Trump.
Trump thinks climate change will be good for America, apparently. President Donald Trump possesses a style described by friends as virile and intuitive and by foes as oafish and oblivious. Some see him a breath of fresh air, with a disarming directness, and others consider him a blustering bully.
A source in Ivanka Trump Kushner’s staff has leaked secret arrangements, showing that Ivanka is preparing for all contingencies, now that the negotiations between her husband and the Russians have surfaced. She made a person to person phone call to Giorgio Armani giving him her husband’s measurements...
The news doesn’t need to be complicated and confusing; that’s what any new release from Microsoft is for. And, as in the case with anything from Microsoft, to keep the news from worrying our pretty little heads over, remember something new and equally indecipherable...
The vast inequality that’s rending our society is not a natural, inevitable or accidental phenomenon — it’s caused intentionally by policy decisions that corporate and political officials make, often in tandem.
The Trump/Comey White House transcript revealed! I just happened to get my hands on the awkward, yet much sought after Trump/Comey White House Dinner transcript and neither one remembers who invited who or who ordered the smoking gun. DONALD TRUMP: So how’s the wife? JAMES COMEY: Good. TRUMP: How are those Petunia’s comin’ this year?
The news doesn’t need to be complicated and confusing; that’s what any new release from Microsoft is for. And, as in the case with anything from Microsoft, to keep the news from worrying our pretty little heads over, remember something new and equally indecipherable...
The firing of FBI Director James Comey by the President of the United States slammed Washington with the suddenness of a two-story bowling ball hitting the South Portico after being dropped from a blimp. And the repercussions have shot across the Capitol like a flurry of Kansas tornadoes.
After Obama lost his government health insurance, he found he couldn’t afford Obamacare WASHINGTON, DC — In an ironic turn of events, President Obama has begun selling his belongings in order to afford healthcare coverage on his very own Obamacare exchange.
A new strain of stress disorder is wreaking havoc on Americans. An epidemic is sweeping the nation, causing sufferers to experience feelings of hopeless doom, certain annihilation and cataclysmic collapse. It’s an existential plague manifesting itself by enveloping the stricken in a black cloud of despairing suicidal thoughts.
WASHINGTON DC – President Donald J. Trump today blamed Sir Winston Churchill for not honoring Neville Chamberlain’s “historic peace agreement” at Munich in 1938.
Our president’s tumultuous time in office so far has conjured up for me a beheading with a crowd size even Donald Trump would be happy with. In Henry VIII‘s reign, he only beheaded two of his six wives — on average, that’s not so bad. And, Anne didn’t even know Putin!
Making fun of the headlines today, so you don’t have to The news doesn’t need to be complicated and confusing; that’s what any new release from Microsoft is for. And, as in the case with anything from Microsoft, to keep the news from worrying our pretty little heads over, remember something new and equally indecipherable...
Wars involving bad hair and nukes are known to be the worst. Enterprising entrepreneurs out there might want to invest in a fleet of tractor backhoes and partial ownership of a limestone quarry, because it’s starting to look like bunker-digging time in America.
What is America’s busiest multi-tasking Washington couple – Ivanka and Jared Kushner – like at home? Everyone wonders what America’s busiest multi-tasking Washington couple, Ivanka and Jared Kushner, is like at home. Well, I happened to get my hands on a transcript — okay, I wiretapped their duvet and beat Obama to it!
The Republican’s latest attempt at a health care plan, as explained by them in this open letter to the public. Okay, so it took us seven years to come up with a deplorable replacement for Obamacare. But in just a month we’ve devised a hugely better plan. It’s called “Omamacare.” This one’s sure to pass.
by The news doesn’t need to be complicated and confusing; that’s what any new release from Microsoft is for. And, as in the case with anything from Microsoft, to keep the news from worrying our pretty little heads over, remember something new and equally indecipherable...
New line of Ivanka fragrances With the wild success of her newly introduced perfume, Ivanka has announced that she will be rolling out an entire line of scents: The next will be “Putin on the Ritz.” The commercial for the fragrance will have Vladamir Putin and Ivanka dressed as Fred Astaire and Ginger Rogers dancing.