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MakeAmericaTheBest

http://makeamericathebest.com
Patrick Riot
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As they watch the final season of Game of Thrones unfold, fans have begun freaking out in therapists offices across the nation that the show will end just like the Sopranos.
A little known astronomer caused an uproar in the scientific community today after leaving a red lifesaver candy on the lens of a powerful telescope.
Building on the popularity of the changes to this year's tax forms, the U.S. Congress promised to work hard in the coming months to add 14 additional worksheets.
President Trump ordered his Chief of Staff to grant Russian President Vladimir Putin a the highest security clearance available from the US government.
Saying that Fake News is using too many needless words in their posts, the president declared a ban on using extra words.
"We've been planning this for about two hundred years, but we had to get the caves ready to live in - so, we're just finally starting to move down there."
Facing a steep decline in bookings for facials, spa owners across the country sought to reassure the public that there is nothing wrong with moisturizing.
Saying he was only just getting started, Robert Mueller released the first of 973 leather-bound volumes detailing Americans' deplorable disregard for the rule of law, and subsequent decent into total decadency. Now available at Barnes and Noble.
Saying it's been hanging over his head for months, Robert Mueller started cranking out that report he's been putting off, which is due like really, really soon.
Increasingly frustrated with congress' inaction on his initiatives, President Trump ordered the National Guard to begin work on an eight-story cheeseburger.
In hopes of forging a compromise, the White House is removing 2,500 catapults from its border security request which were meant to defend the wall between Mexico in the event of a siege.
A dog belonging to political consultant Roger Stone was arrested outside his Ft. Lauderdale home brandishing a 9mm handgun in front of a crowd of children. It's arraignment is scheduled for Tuesday.
After running a battery of tests to uncover the cause of your symptoms, your doctor this week reported he pretty much stymied as to what kind of issues you got.
Seeing no other way to remedy a dangerous situation, the president ended the government shutdown in hopes of averting a nationwide cheeseburger shortage.
Staking out what they hope will be another winning slogan, the president's campaign released a new theme line for his re-election in 2020: Make America Great Again Again
In hopes of finally putting all this nonsense behind Him, God decided to skip over the year 2019 entirely, and start the next presidential election ASAP.
Although believing he was locked in a titanic struggle of multi-dimensional chess for control of the universe with the Being who created it, Martin Gimlok of Shelvre, Delaware, it turns out, has been playing something much closer to the popular game checkers.
For the woman who has everything - this smart looking leather-bound book written by a Russian spy will give you the power to HYPNOTIZE your husband to do your bidding around the house, at parties, or even at his place of employment!
US Defense Secretary Jim Mattis abruptly resigned Thursday, dramatically boosting the chances of job seekers with no discernible skills whatsoever of getting a plum cabinet position in the most powerful organization on earth.