Trump Demands Mexican Spirits Build Wall Around American Heaven

Once Mexico is done building a wall along the US-Mexico border on Earth, they can start one separating American heaven from Mexican heaven in the afterlife, Donald Trump says.

Citing statistics suggestive of extremely lax criteria for entrance into Mexican heaven, Trump referred to its spiritual residents as 'animals'.

"They're animals. Worse than animals, in fact," he said. "They let anyone in Mexican heaven. Rapists, murderers. Millions every year. These people are no angels, trust me. It's unbelievable."

Added Trump: "The population of these punks is out of control, their side of heaven stinks, and so they try to sneak into American heaven. Well, no more."

To corroborate his claims, Trump pointed to several complaints relatives of deceased Americans have received via prayer.

"My mother who has passed on lives near the border with Mexican heaven, and she says that the dead Mexicans play loud mariachi music all night, steal their harp playing jobs and pick heaven lettuce for half of minimum wage," one man described. "Also, they come over and rape everybody."