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No matter how embarrassed you are by keyboard plaque, do not attempt to remove it with your dab rig torch and isopropyl alcohol.
President Trump continued to push back on the impeachment proceedings against him today, suggesting that he would reject any budget resolutions Congress should pass in the coming weeks unless any and all charges against him are dropped.
Few activities enrage feminists more than side-saddle riding. We're talking horses, now, not some perverse spin on scissoring. Feminists of every sort—classic, non-binary, echo [sic], inter sectional, intercollegiate, separatist, and beard wearing—lose their shit at the sight of a female sitting side saddle on a horse.
Kirill Morozov is a twenty-year-old from Belarus with a bad haircut, some incriminating facial tattoos, and hell hounds on his trail. Postcards from the Pug Bus is the first U.S. satire site to break his story.
Is Britain’s National Health Service being transformed into a ‘National Death Service’? Activist argues Tories turning NHS into institution for mass euthanasia of poor, disabled and elderly.
"8%. Not bad," he remarked, calculating from his laptop's browser history the 42 minutes out of his 8-hour workday that he spent on web porn.
Representing an unknown percentage of the total number of fetuses the president has had aborted during his lifetime, the spirits of the unborn Trump offspring were unanimous in their preference to have been given an opportunity to live during a mass seance in Atlantic City Saturday.
As scientists around the world rush to try to engineer a vaccine that can halt COVID-19 in its tracks, hope for the first such prophylactic came to a disappointing halt yesterday when it was shown to not cause autism in children.
Will Boris Johnson's much vaunted virility, as he gets another woman up the duff, prove to be his downfall? Top Labour spin doctor plans election broadcast simulating Prime Minister in bed copulating with a woman - believes public revulsion at sight of all those wobbling buttocks and horrendous grunting will persuade voters to abandon Boris.
COVID-19 is no joke, Dave. Millions have been infected, hundreds of thousands have died, and its just getting started. People not adhering to public health guidelines to avoid crowds such as this Vanilla Ice rap performer is bound to attract has already caused a recent spike in cases, and as a result the country now stands on the brink.
Dedicated to a focus on lifting the spirits of its readership during today's troubled times, the site appears to have been dealt a fatal blow by what officials described as an "inferno cyclone" that left its headquarters a ruin of smoldering ash yesterday.
The man who took the podium at a White House press conference this morning is continuing to claim that he, not Donald Trump, is the President of the United States. "I'm the President, so let's stop this foolishness and get back to business," the man, handsome and well-spoken, responded to repeated questions from reporters asking where Donald Trump was.
Thousands of fantasy football managers were left high and dry Sunday night after wide receiver Robert Woods was deactivated at the last minute by his real-life team for "personal reasons".
It's a 1970s game show, a 1932 movie, and a late 1920s marketing ploy designed to bait people into using more matches. It's three on a match, that's what it is, Skippy, and today is its national celebration day.
Those soccer moms and their male-pattern-baldness, girly-man, yes-ma'am allies are at it again. Having come for your candy cigarettes and Four Loko, they're coming for your plastic straws. Here's how to thwart them.
Brighten up your home, office or day-care center with an assortment of Christian-themed Christmas coloring pages! They're all here, from the Incredible Hulk taking Jesus down from the cross to Mary contemplating throwing the newborn Messiah down a well. Simply cut, color and glue these pictures to a wall or window and enjoy the warming glow they'll infuse into your living or work space this holiday season
Penultimate means "last but one in a series of things; the next to last." Penultimate does not mean nor should it be allowed to mean "the most ultimate" or "the most awesome" ever.
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9 year-old Make-A-Wish recipient Connor Banks had a busy first day as the newest member of the Milwaukee police department Friday, "solving" a robbery and shooting at several unarmed African American bystanders.
What lies behind Pope Francis’ assault on a woman in St Peter’s Square on New Year’s Eve? Was he fighting off sex starved Papal groupie, or was he preparing to fight evil with his fists?
In the blurred new reality of quarantines and stay at home orders, one man has conceived of a new name for all the days of the week that for many have lost all distinction: Sturmwedonfrituday.

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