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Washington, DC—Special Prosecutor, Robert Mueller, the man assigned to investigate President Trump’s possible obstruction of justice was last seen reluctantly entering a limousine outside of the downtown DC Hooters on 7th Street. Eye witnesses claim several of Trump’s security detail surrounded Mueller, while mindlessly chanting “make a America great again” over and over again. One passerby claims Mr. Mueller was…
The news doesn’t need to be complicated and confusing; that’s what any new release from Microsoft is for. And, as in the case with anything from Microsoft, to keep the news from worrying our pretty little heads over, remember something new and equally indecipherable...
Kauai, HI—This trip proved the most challenging for team Search Truth Quest, at least financially. We would make both cryptozoological history as well as history of our flex funds. For this journey STQ was on the hunt for two Hawaiian heavyweights: a tribe of hobbits known as the Menehune as well as a 12-foot guardian lizard known as the…
An enthusiastic but unrealistic work colleague who claims that he is going to be ‘all over’ a task that needs completing this afternoon, is in reality only going to give it a slightly increased bit of his attention for a few minutes, it has been disappointingly revealed. ‘Those excel spreadsheets with the monthly figures on...
I recently had the honor and privilege of interviewing my jerk face friend, Mick Zano. We met over a beer in downtown Flagstaff to discuss fake news, satire, and what Zano calls the State of the Onion. We had our fair share of battles in the lead up to the election, as he was a little more…
Evidence of “voter fatigue” has been shown by a survey where a cross section of people were asked if they would like to punch the next person who asked a survey question. Speaking from a hospital trolley in Charing Cross Hospital, Ray Jenkins, a junior researcher for YouGov, said, “You bet they want to punch...
You've all seen Melania being cold to me. No hand holding, eye rolls, ignoring, walking separately, bad, bad. But I'm not upset because at least the American people still love me.
With boss man bearing down on you, tilt your head to the left. His head will follow yours. Wait ten seconds. Hold the tilt like you would an ice cream cone.
Political depravity and other forms of moral depravity often go together. Senator Willow has a deeply unpleasant experience with the party establishment; but after being expelled from the party for her ‘unpatriotic’ and ‘idealistic,’ rejection of the immoral and corrupt war consensus, things are about to get even worse. Corruption has a thousand faces. And […]
If you get stuck in a pose and you know you can't get out of it without queefing, simply stay in that pose for the rest of eternity.
This online animation series is hilarious! But a serious point first: Some of you will need to be careful though (depending on your background, e.g. nationality), and not share it on social media. This funny web series on the early days of the Quran and of Islam is potentially even more ‘offensive’ to blasphemy kooks […]
Senator Bubble’s day had finally arrived. But most of all, it was America’s day! Wait… did I get that one the right way around? ‘Freakin’ straight on, Bubble!’ Alan roared. Bubble cleared his throat. He cleared his bowels, and then his throat again. Well, might as well make an effort, huh? ‘Alright, everybody!’ Bubble roared. […]
Comey said just what they thought. It came as no surprise. “But do not tweet no matter what,” his lawyers did advise. So junior was the surrogate, who rolled out all the tweets as more news spread of Russiagate across the nation’s streets. The lawyer got the dates all wrong...
A financially strapped, dialysis-dependent supporter of President Donald Trump said he would gladly give up his life in defense of Republican efforts to kill countless Americans as part of their overhaul of the country’s health care system.
Trump, who has authored 17 books (making him the first president to have written more books than he’s read), spoke directly to press today to confirm the tragedy.
The high-ranking Republican is leaving Congress to become the new face of Buc-ee’s, according to officials with the popular Texas-based convenience store chain.
All of the members of President Donald Trump’s Cabinet have had their gag reflexes surgically excised to help orally provide uninterrupted pleasure to their boss.
The latest installment in the animated hit series 'Cars' has revealed a disturbing and dark underbelly of a group of our population that is normally portrayed with all the glossy doe-eyed innocence of little lambs.

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