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Taking his ongoing feud with John McCain to another dimension this week, President Trump reported today on Twitter that spirits he has been in contact with through a Ouija Board have tied deceased Senator John McCain to the recent Boeing Max 8 tragedies.
A zombie killed by hikers in a remote border region of New Mexico Sunday has been revealed to be Jesus Christ of Nazareth, our Lord and Savior.
Investigation into Stephen Hawking's former nurse uncovers underground network of gladiatorial contests for the disabled. Did late physicist's use of high tech weaponry to win competition lead to Far Eastern gambling syndicate 'offing' him?
President Trump selected himself as White House Employee of the Month this week, the 27th consecutive time he has conferred himself the same honor.
Building on the popularity of the changes to this year's tax forms, the U.S. Congress promised to work hard in the coming months to add 14 additional worksheets.
President Trump ordered his Chief of Staff to grant Russian President Vladimir Putin a the highest security clearance available from the US government.
A little known astronomer caused an uproar in the scientific community today after leaving a red lifesaver candy on the lens of a powerful telescope.
Trump scientists announced a major breakthrough in Artificial Non-Intelligence today with the unveiling of the ZeepZop 2000, a highly unintelligent device with no practical function.
A black woman claiming to have escaped kidnappers in Chicago has been identified as Brady Baker, a boy who went missing from his Wisconsin home 8 years ago.
Did the dinosaurs fart themselves into extinction? Top scientist sparks controversy with new theory that Jurassic giants own noxious emissions might have wiped them out by triggering catastrophic climate change.
Pushing back against "PC thugs", President Trump vowed today that he would work to restore the rights of workers to harass one another in the workplace.
As soon as David Lammy used the term 'White Saviour Syndrome' with regard to certain Comic Relief celebrities, the reaction was inevitable: the ludicrous allegation that Lammy is being racist for condemning white people trying to capitalise on their charity 'work'...

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