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Every day until Thursday, there’ll be a new instalment in our latest “Who Said it First?” quiz series. Previously, it was Tony Blair and Hitler. This time, it’s the Garcon-Wonder, Emmanuel Macron. On the fourth and final day, the quiz answers will appear. Make sure to tell your friends; and feel free to share the […]
Welp, this is how it all ends. If there's some sort of service to remember me, please have them mention my karate belts.
The former Press Secretary has admitted that the nausea associated with being President Trump’s mouthpiece, did not prepare him for the full horror of a snog from James Corden. Despite once having Trump oozing out of every orifice, Mr. Spicer admitted that only Mr. Corden had made him feel as dirty as a North Korean...
Despite the ongoing collapse of conservative ‘thought’, each news cycle still brings a barrage of new and intriguing rightwing dimsights. At least Puerto Rico has a storm to blame for knocking it back 30 years, what’s the republican party’s excuse? Today, as the Antarctic Pine Glacier retreats another 100 miles, the GOP’s brain capacity retreats another 100K neurons. Meanwhile, our…
Italy: "I just called Comcast and asked if there's an extra charge for Rome-ing? ...Hello? What are you? An audience or a Michelangelo painting?"
Tweet Tower—Two turkeys, Ozzy & Harriet, are desperately awaiting word of the president’s overdue pardon. The National Pardoning Ceremony is a time honored tradition, but, thus far in his presidency, Donald Trump has ignored most customs and traditions. The turkeys are demanding the president keep his word and pardon the two before they become the guests of honor…
For merely the tenth year in a row, the McClusky household has been thrown into turmoil upon the disquieting discovery that someone failed to put the Christmas lights away tidily. The calumnious deed was made worse by the fact that everything was covered in glitter and pine needles; while the box containing the crib scene...
by Will Durst.This tax reform rewards the rich for the hard work of ripping of the rest of us. They’re partying at the Cracker Barrel. Wings are flying out of Hooters. The Olive Garden’s endless breadsticks have ... Read moreRobbing Hood: GOP’s ‘Tax Reform’Subscribe to our monthly Humor Times magazine here, available worldwide, in print or digital format.
Crozet, VA—God has claimed responsibility for the derailment of a train carrying a number of republican congressman outside of the small town of Crozet, Virginia earlier today. God stated the attack was a response to last night’s State Of The Union address. His or Her Holiness told the U.S. press today, “Do not follow this…
by Paul Lander.Making fun of the headlines today, so you don’t have to The news doesn’t need to be complicated and confusing; that’s what any new release from Microsoft is for. And, as in the case with ... Read moreRipping the Headlines Today, 3/5/18Subscribe to our monthly Humor Times magazine here, available worldwide, in print or digital format. Pick up a copy at Barnes & Noble and other stores all over the U.S.
Our nation’s true political spectrum is not right to left, but top to bottom, and Populism is about reducing the distance between the two. My father, W.F. “High” Hightower, was a populist.
The government, the establishment and the Deep State are the most persecuted people in the world. Here is a magical incantation that will keep you all safe from foreign enemies and domestic dissidents. *** First they came for the Neocons. And I didn’t speak up because I wasn’t a Neocon. Then they came for the […]The post CIA Hymnbook (VIII): First They Came for the Neocons appeared first on GlossyNews.com.
Offred was forced to have sex with the commander again in front of his wife. Who treats white women like that!? Ugh, it was so terrible, because that like literally is my life.
Everybody’s favorite radio talk show host, Jerry Duncan, interviews Bernie Sanders!

ANNOUNCER Live from under a rock in your backyard, it’s The Jerry Duncan Show.

JERRY Good morning listeners nationwide. Is it a good morning? We’ll soon find out. Today on the show my guest is the Independent Senator from Vermont, Bernie Sanders.
The news doesn’t need to be complicated and confusing; that’s what any new release from Microsoft is for. And, as in the case with anything from Microsoft, to keep the news from worrying our pretty little heads over, remember something new and equally indecipherable...
Mount Olympus—Apollo, the Roman God of the Sun, has taken responsibility for both the track of this week’s solar eclipse as well as the message it was meant to convey to all Americans. Apollo minced no words, “Up yours, United States! You have got to be the stupidest civilization we Olympians have ever visited, and you have no idea…
Comedian Kathy Griffin is interviewed by our intrepid radio talk show host, Jerry Duncan.

ANNOUNCER Live from under a rock in your backyard, it’s The Jerry Duncan Show.

JERRY Good morning listeners nationwide. Is it a good morning? We’ll soon find out.
Wayne Rooney has provided a timely reminder to fellow Manchester United players of his value to the team, following his appearance on the subs bench last weekend and ongoing speculation that he is out of favour with new manager Jose Mourinho.

‘Out of interest, how are you guys getting to Stoke next weekend?’ Rooney asked a crowded dressing room after Saturday comfortable win over Leicester City. ‘Obviously, I usually take us in my Ford Transit. Nice and warm in there with the underseat heating, we can crank up the tunes on the stereo, but it does kinda depend on whether I’m actually playing
There’s no indication that Fox News is tacking back toward sanity. A Laura Ingraham slot on primetime represents another doubling down on their conservative suckage. She’s the only Foxeteer arguably right of Hannity. Nothing should be right of Hannity, well, unless it has a shaved head and a Thor’s hammer tat. Don’t you realize if you make your viewers any less insightful they’re going to…

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