Check Please!
Des Moines, Iowa – (satireworld.com)

At a Wednesday press conference in Iowa President Donald Trump addressed his concerns about his past opponent’s health and vitality and especially the reports she was wearing a medical alert device. He also questioned her ability to properly function without succumbing to bouts of pain in which she might require doses of powerful medications which he felt could cloud her ‘good judgement’ or result in more trips and falls..
Washington DC:

The prophesy of the four Democratic Jackasses of the Apocalypse is foretold in the last chapters of the Democratic National Committee (DNC) Book of Socialist Moron Politicians. The four Jackasses are symbols of the different events which will take place when the American people, in conjunction with the Republican Party, finally confront and vanquish the stable of corrupt, lying Democratic Party politicians.
Vatican City -(SatireWorld.com)

In an effort to quell demands for his resignation from Vatican leaders, Pope Francis left Rome on Monday to travel to the US to visit shrines and diocese leaders. He hoped to stop at various religious landmarks he hadn't officially visited as Pope in previous US visits in an effort to shore up US solidarity after sex scandals have rocked the Church.
Government announces introduction of new ‘Universal Hate’ policy, under which all existing forms of hate crime, regardless of whether it is racial, religious or gender based, will be amalgamated into one single type of hate. Ministers hope new system will simplify process of hate crime for perpetrators, victims and police.
New York, NY – (SatireWorld.com)

Thursday’s debut of the Presidential Alert of the National Wireless Emergency Alert System hit a bum note today with proctologists warning of ‘potentially dire consequences’ as telecoms providers promised to crank up cell phone tones and vibration functions ahead of the anticipated trial.
Pittsburgh, PA - (satireworld.com)

Joanna Cameron, star of the mid-1970’s Saturday morning television series Isis, claims that she is not in any way affiliated with the terrorist group ISIS (called ISIL by some Democrats to show support for and pander to Syria).
San Francisco, CA - (satireworld.com)

California Senator Diane Feinstein (D-CA) had a recent physical and reports of the odd medical findings were leaked to FOX News. Doctors discovered she is carrying historical artifacts that she never knew she had….Prehistoric cave drawings between her breasts!
New York City, NY – (satireworld.com)
Former First Lady, Senator, Presidential Candidate, murderer, traitor, and crooked lawyer Hillary Clinton has revealed that Brett Kavanaugh sent her inappropriate emails of a sexual nature. Clinton, however, is surprisingly unable to locate the emails.
Chicago, IL – (SatireWorld.com)
Ronald McDonald is falling on hard times after a 47 year run as the official spokesman and mascot for the fast food giant McDonalds. Citing unresponsive interest in youngsters now preoccupied with apps, gaming, and computers, today's children find the yellow-jumpered mascot, well, just plain boring.
Satire World Editorial:
Last year, we had idiots camping out all over this country to protest the one percenters. They disrupted business on Wall Street and in many other cities just for publicity purposes. This group claimed to represent 99% of the American people, but they didn’t represent me.
Although often maligned for not knowing the significance of American history, President Trump delivered an impassioned speech today to commemorate the anniversary of President Lincoln's "Gettysberg Address" in the town of Schittysberg, Kentucky.
(SatireWorld.com)

In 2015 the President Obama went on the airwaves today praising the celebration of Kwanzaa and wishing celebrants a ‘happy and healthy’ Kwanzaa.
I’m not sure, but the last time I looked my Kwanzaa was looking pretty healthy. So, what the hell is Kwanzaa anyway?
El Paso, Texas – (satireworld.com)
Barrio Santa Claus, who visits his paisanos and his hermanitos every year on Christmas Eve to deliver gifts, has announced plans to paint his low rider something than the traditional “arrest me red. “La Migra always tries to arrest me when I cross the border because my ride just stands out in the night sky as I fly across the Rio Grande. I think that if I went with a better black, I’d be able to sneak across without a problem… at least that’s what all of the mojados and the coyotes tell me.”
Hollywood,CA – (satireworld.com)

A 2005 potential box office fiasco/lost film has been discovered in Hollywood while cleaning out a storage room at Universal Pictures. This movie, not released in theaters, may star the worst acting cast of all time.
For the woman who has everything - this smart looking leather-bound book written by a Russian spy will give you the power to HYPNOTIZE your husband to do your bidding around the house, at parties, or even at his place of employment!
New York City, NY – (satireworld.com)

New New York Congresswoman Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez, who had already made a name for herself with her wild and outlandish accusations, claims, and actions, has admitted that Rita Repulsa, the sworn enemy of the Mighty Morphin Power Rangers, is her biological mother “Like most little girls, my mother is my hero. I have modeled my life after her and want to do and accomplish everything that she has done. I want to continue her work. People say that I look a lot like her when I get emotional, and I consider that to be a great compliment.”
Giuliani, who has lately been busy trying to reconcile the complex and sometimes contradictory threads of the president's various scandals, was in the midst of arguing that remarks he made previously denying that there had been any collusion between Russia and the Trump presidential campaign didn't mean that nobody on the campaign ever colluded with the Russians when the blood first became visible.
Actress and former 'Saved by the Bell' and 'Beverly Hills 90210' star Tiffani Amber Thiessen has reportedly cancelled plans to play herself in a real-life drama where she was to be kidnapped and held for ransom by bikers.
According to FBI spokesman Dale Palmer, the same who led the investigation that culminated in Loughlin's arrest on Tuesday, the elder Loughlin offered a judge and members of the Los Angeles District Attorney's Office an array of enticements - including coupons and vouchers for meals and local attractions - in a bid to insure her daughter would spend any future sentence she may receive in the exclusive prison.

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