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Following criticism from both Democrats and fellow Republicans about his harsh tone, GOP presidential candidate Donald Trump says he will not alter his tone one bit, maintaining that what people see is the natural color of his skin.
OKLAHOMA CITY (The Barbed Wire) - After the most recent defacing of a monument in this town, sources have revealed that the #BlackLivesMatter movement now controls most of the paint in America. The paint hoarding is causing hardships for the housing, automotive, art, and paint-sniffing communities.
Stamford, CT –  Lizzy Morgan is a normal 6 year old girl who loves her chicken.  “She’s kind of a picky eater,” says Mom.  “The one thing she will eat religiously is chicken. 
NEW YORK, New York (The Adobo Chronicles®) -   For far too long, white people have been absent from films, television shows, news anchor desks, advertising billboards and product labels. But finally, they are taking the spotlight away from people of color, thanks to a new MTV show, "White People." The documentary, produced by Filipino undocumented…
WASHINGTON, D.C.--Nearly a billion common houseflies buzzed the nation's capital today to protest a bill that would require flies to show two forms of photo identification when purchasing fly-swatters.  The bill, authored by Sen. Patrick Miyagi (D-HI), has passed the Senate and has been sent to President Obama. Proponents of the proposed new law argue…
Google is launching a new online accountancy service, Google Diddle, just in time for the tax return deadline of 31 January.
WASHINGTON, D.C.—Vice President Joe Biden briefed media today on his upcoming schedule, the status of several projects his office is working on, and his mastery of a deadly effective karate move that is virtually impossible to defend. “We’ll be in Omaha on Wednesday and Boise the following day,” Biden said, “And I’m going to request…
JACKSON, Mississippi—Officer Clyde Harris, a twelve-year veteran of the Jackson Police Department who earlier this year was exonerated after fatally shooting an unarmed black man, has admitted to colleagues and those closest to him that, even though he has faced intense criticism from various groups and individuals across the nation, he feels extremely fortunate that…
David Cameron plans to adopt India’s caste system in the UK to bring the country more in line with the Victorian era.
STAMFORD, CONNECTICUT (The Nil Admirari) - Earlier today, Jerry Springer, the host of The Jerry Springer Show and former Democratic mayor of Cincinnati, announced he was changing parties so he could run for the Republican presidential nomination. Springer said he was running to "add some civility and decorum" to the Republican field of candidates, which he described as "lying Neanderthal clowns."
Jacksonville, FL –  It’s no secret the world is moving faster than ever.  There is more stress and less time to sleep.  For the millions who have various sleep disorders, this is a recipe for severe anxiety and depression.
SANTA CLARA, CA — According to several reports from eyewitnesses that have seen him just hours before Super Bowl 50 is t…
Police Announce Plans for Special Squads to Snatch Cakes, Chips and chocolate from Fat Women as Top Doctor Warns of Super Sized Terror Threat Posed by Female Obesity in UK.
WASHINGTON, D.C. (The Adobo Chronicles® ) - Republican presidential candidate Donald Trump is about to get a dose of his own medicine. Trump has been very vocal in the campaign trail about his dislike for immigrants and has called on the Department of Homeland Security to deport all anchor babies -- children born in the U.S.…
THE VATICAN, Italy - (The Adobo Chronicles® ) – Pope Francis has rejected a request by Republican presidential candidate Donald Trump for a private audience when the leader of the Roman Catholic Church visits the United States September 22-27, 2015. During his papal visit, Francis will meet with President and Mrs. Barack Obama, address a…
DC has floundered as rival comic company Marvel has soared in recent years. With every record-breaking movie Marvel released, from Iron Man to Guardians of the Galaxy, DC executives tore their hair out and tried to reverse-engineer Marvel’s success.
Kim Davis is free. And it didn't come without thousands of supporters rallying outside the Carter County Detention Center and a visit from Old MacDonald. Kim Davis expressed her desire to get back to her post as a county clerk, but what she discovered upon her release from jail was devastating.
WASHINGTON (The Nil Admirari) - Today, the Center for Disease Control (CDC) warned Americans that listening to Donald Trump, Sarah Palin, Mike Huckabee, Ted Cruz, and anyone else classified as a "Mad Republican" for even a minute "will absolutely result in concussion-like symptoms." CDC Director Dr. Tom Frieden explained the grade of concussion-like symptoms an American risked depended on how far to the right the Mad Republican speaker they listened to was.

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