NEW YORK CITY, NEW YORK (The Nil Admirari) - Earlier today, Republican presidential candidate and Governor of New Jersey Chris Christie told Fox and Friends that he was "not mad, just stop citing stupid poll numbers." Christie has consistently been polling lower than the margin of error in most national polls of likely Republican primary voters, and will not be eligible to participate in the first Republican debate being hosted by Fox News next week if that continues.
Summer holidayers across the world have been warned not to eat ice creams while crossing busy roads, according to the United Nations.
Hopping around in anger on his stuck-together legs, the 2016 Oscar for Best Actor was livid with having to go to yer another white actor.
NEW YORK CITY, NEW YORK (The Nil Admirari) - Republican presidential candidate and billionaire Donald Trump threw a kitten off of the 58th floor of Trump Tower this morning. Trump claimed he did it to show everyone he was unstoppable, and polls taken immediately following the incident showed him surging even further ahead of his Republican opponents.
NEW YORK, New York (The Adobo Chronicles® ) - The word war between Republican presidential candidate Donald Trump and FOX News seems to be coming to an end, thanks to an agreement recently made between Trump and FOX News Chairman Roger Ailes. Earlier in the week, Ailes was quoted as saying to Trump, 'We resolve…
NEW YORK, New York (The Adobo Chronicles® ) - Republican presidential candidate Donald Trump laid out his immigration policy last weekend: build a border wall paid for by Mexico, deport all of the 11 Million undocumented immigrants now in the U.S., and amend the constitution to re-define birthright citizenship. Today, Trump fired one of his employees,…
LAS VEGAS (The Barbed Wire) - After a town hall meeting here this week, reporters again tried to get Hillary Clinton to come clean over her continuously unraveling email scandal. Revelations keep mounting that the former first lady broke the law and tried to deceive the public about her dealings as Secretary of State.
WASHINGTON (The Nil Admirari) - This morning, the Republican National Committee (RNC) announced the GOP was adopting the slogan "VOTE GOP 2016 OR DIE." RNC Chairman Reince Priebus explained the new Republican slogan best summarized the current discourse of the party's members, especially its presidential candidates.
NEW YORK, New York (The Adobo Chronicles® ) - Earlier this week, the Rev. Al Sharpton declared that “people that were from Puerto Rico all would have to go back if their parents were undocumented.” In other words, Sharpton believes that Puerto Ricans are not U.S. citizens. Soon enough, Republican presidential candidate Donald Trump, while speaking to a…
“You want a leader who can stand up to Washington?” said the smarmy sociopath in the ad. “C’mon. I just spent two hours giving Congress the middle finger to its face. Literally. I make Trump look like an amateur.”
MENLO PARK, California (The Adobo Chronicles®) - During a Q&A session at Facebook headquarters Tuesday, Mark Zuckerberg announced that a "dislike" button is finally coming to the social-media network. "I think people have asked about the dislike button for many years. Today is a special day because today is the day I can say we're working…
STOCKHOLM, Sweden (The Adobo Chronicles® ) - When President Barack Obama was announced as the recipient of the 2009 Nobel Peace Prize, the decision was met with much controversy. Obama admitted that he was surprised by the choice. Conservatives were quick to express their outrage and even supporters of the president questioned whether the award…
LAS VEGAS — Undefeated and five-division world champion Floyd Mayweather, Jr. responded to Manny Pacquiao’s comments com…
NEW YORK CITY, NEW YORK (The Nil Admirari) - Today, the corporate media in the United States announced it was "upset" unapproved Democratic presidential candidate Senator Bernie Sanders of Vermont was "doing well," and seemed to be reaching Americans with his populist progressive message despite their overt efforts to pretend he did not exist. The decidedly right-wing corporate media also asserted it was "shocked" the narrative for the presidential election was not going the way it had planned, as Sanders continued to beat Hillary Clinton in various polls.
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