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James Carville described Pennsylvania as "Philadelphia on one side, Pittsburgh on the other, and Alabama in between.” We should not be surprised, therefore, that today is National Drunks Against Mad Mothers Day, sponsored by DAMM Pennsylvania.
Most people can recall their first sexual experience, but judging from the responses to the 2020 Postcards from the Pug Bus Sex Survey, not everyone puts a smiley face on that memory.
Jessica Simpson read the news today, oh boy, and now the singer-actress wants to adopt a pillow angel. Ms. Simpson had been interested in adopting a child formerly, but after scoring poorly on a questionnaire sent to her by an adoption agency in Tijuana, Mexico, she became dispirited.
"Baptism is the original sin, inflicted on innocent children without their consent. From the time of Abraham the notion of sacrificing a blameless child has been the true believer's go-to move, but if churches were honest, they would raise the age of consent for baptism to twenty-one, at least."
National Poisoned Cha-Cha Day, when the war between the sexes took a turn for the grim after a woman in Sao de Jose Rio Preto, Brazil, had tried to kill her husband by putting a poisonous substance in her vagina and then asking him if he fancied a box lunch.
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With rising tensions between the United States and Iran fueling concerns over a new war in the Middle East, the Pentagon today sought to address the fears many American parents are expressing regarding their children's health and safety should they be drafted.
Toyota was been swamped with complaints about drivers turning left from right-hand lanes, taking up handicapped spaces in parking lots, using their high beams to blind other drivers, and crushing companion animals because the drivers didn't see them.
There is only one kind of person in the world. He who knows about Schrödinger’s cat, and he who doesn't. For most of us, however, Schrödinger’s cat is a meme in search of a meaning.
"The proof is in the 'putting,' so to speak," added Mr. Gonzales. "Strom Thurmond, Tony Randall, and Paul McCartney were all rowing on Golden Pond when they fathered children."
"8%. Not bad," he remarked, calculating from his laptop's browser history the 42 minutes out of his 8-hour workday that he spent on web porn.
When the Blessed Virgin Mary, who knew something about warding off penetration, appeared to Polycarp in a dream, Polycarp awoke and immediately stuffed his ears with cow dung,
THE VATICAN (The Adobo Chronicles, Rome Bureau) - Pope Francis has already publicly apologized for violating a woman at The Vatican a couple of days ago.  The incident where the Pope slapped the hand of a woman pilgrim after she grabbed his hand was caught on video and has gone super viral. But Vatican officials are…
Not content with persecuting people who use "after-market" handicapped stickers in spaces that would otherwise remain empty, the CapiNazis are coming after emotional support animals.
WASHINGTON, D.C. (The Adobo Chronicles, Washington Bureau) -President Donald Trump has signed the National Defense Authorization Act (NDAA) for 2020 that establishes a U.S. Space Force as the sixth branch of the U.S. armed forces—despite the Outer Space Treaty designating space as a global commons to be used for peaceful purposes. Trump signed the NDAA flanked by…
Penultimate means "last but one in a series of things; the next to last." Penultimate does not mean nor should it be allowed to mean "the most ultimate" or "the most awesome" ever.
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In order to promote a more inclusive linguistic union, the Pug Bus vows to use "gay," "gaily," and many clever derivations thereof to flog shamelessly our Gay OG campaign.
"The Aristocrats" is the world's filthiest joke. As a public service we present this fill-in-the-blanks version of the joke, which you are free to adapt for your own purposes and family occasions.
Three years after a national poll found that 46% of Americans believed in Santa Claus, a new survey shows that a similar number continues to have faith in the (not so jolly) fat man in the White House.
So, Virginia, there was no manger, no GPS star in the sky, no ripe-smelling shepherds, no ox or ass shitting all over the place. Jesus was born somewhere. We’re just calling bullshit on the story that organized religions have been peddling all these years.
Fair Kamala cozily strapped in her bed, electrodes from focus groups taped to her head. Short Petey was playing with his newest toy, a lovely dark-chocolate Nubian boy.

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