MANILA, Philippines (The Adobo Chronicles, Manila Bureau) -  The Independent reports that a victim of clerical sex abuse has said Pope Francis told him God made him gay and his sexuality “does not matter”. Juan Carlos Cruz spoke privately with the pontiff last week about the abuse he suffered at the hands of a prominent Chilean priest. …

MANILA, Philippines (The Adobo Chronicles, Manila Bureau) - He holds the distinction of being the most prolific Philippine Senator, having proposed the most bills that have become law.  But it’s really more of a numbers’ game as opposed to the actual content or significance of his bills. His name is Antonio Trillanes, a former navy officer…

Responding to reports showing lowering birth rates across the nation, the Department of Education is rolling out a controversial new campaign titled "Just the Tip" that tells teens that it's okay to engage in unprotected sex for brief periods of time.

The US Treasury today announced that the country is replacing the dollar, which has been in use since 1785, with a new monetary unit: America First Bucks.

Westminster Kennel Show….opps Royal Wedding!

(SatireWorld.com)
Singer Elton John was upset at the Royal Wedding to see that he wasn’t “the biggest Queen” in attendance. He felt that his presence was upstaged by that of Queen Elizabeth II at the marriage of her grandson, Prince Harry, to Meagan the Commoner.

Berkeley CA – (SatireWorld.com)

Students at the University of California, Berkeley (UC Berkeley) held a protest demanding that the University create both “safe spaces” for transgender students and “spaces of color” for non-white students on campus. A wall of protesters also prevented white students from studying in the Student Union and stopped traffic at the main intersection in the front of campus. The left wing UC Berkeley Administration caved to the protesting students, but instituted a set of new “safe space” safety rules to reduce the effects of any micro-aggressive behavior by other

NEW YORK (TheSkunk.org) — Rudy Giuliani today told FOX News there is no reason President Trump would have to give up his presidency while serving time in prison.

Please arrive precisely on time!

NY,NY – (satireworld.com)

Parkland survivor and rabid gun control activist skin-headed Emma González lectured gun owners Thursday at an education forum. Gonzalez is known nationally as being a ‘bald-headed mean spirited dyke look-alike with an unusually foul demeanor on camera.’

Cairo, IL – (satireworld.com)
Cairo police were tagged as racist and quick-on-the-gun after a hastily formed riot squad descended upon a gathering of Congresswoman Maxine Waters supporters assembling in a local park.

MANILA, Philippines (The Adobo Chronicles, Manila Bureau) - The Philippines holds several world records but nothing could be more significant than the possiblity of a record of having three sitting Presidents. Simultaneously. It’s looking more and more that Senate Minority Leader and actor-comedian Tito Sotto of the inseparable showbiz trio Tito, Vic (Sotto) and Joey (De Leon) could…

Dedicated to 'Covering female issues from a male perspective', Rose and a panel comprised of Scott Baio, Anthony Weiner and Oliver Stone spent the program's inaugural episode exploring topics ranging from the #MeToo movement and ladies-only gyms to the pros and cons of tampons.

Once immensely popular, and now all but forgotten, the characters of the game Pokèmon Go struggle to eek out a living on the streets of America.

MANILA, Philippines (The Adobo Chronicles, Manila Bureau) - GMA News is reporting that Senator Chiz  Escudero and his wife, actress Heart Evangelista are pregnant! This makes Escudero the world’s first pregnant heterosexual man. Previously, Thomas Beatie held the disinction as the world’s first pregnant male.  Beatie, a trans man, had gender reassignment surgery in March 2002…

Ames, Iowa – (SatireWorld.com)
It was a beautiful summer day in Ames, Iowa. The state Fair was in full swing, and thousands of patrons strolled the midway in search of the perfect summer’s dream…Good country food, fine samplings of drink, and the stalwart of carnival fare…The Corn Dog!

Emora, NM – (satireworld.com)

Key leaders in the Democratic Party are calling for the ban of Romaine Lettuce (now called assault lettuce). According to figures from the CDC (Center for Disease Control), there have now been more than 150 reported cases of food borne illness reported in over 30 states due to Assault Lettuce. There have already been deaths.

Although normally withheld until October, the Nobel Committee today released the nomination of NBA great Dennis Rodman for its Peace Prize, saying that the award is a foregone conclusion.

A man who used an assault rifle to save a Hawaiian neighborhood from a flow of hot lava is being hailed as a hero today.

Top academic blasts 'right wing cry babies' for over sensitivity to issues such as race, gender and equality. Argues the 'right and wrong' need to grow up and stop whining on social media about 'unfairness' of having their privilege threatened by minorities.

Time travelling frauds and flat earth idiots - why does our media continue to promote these crackpots? Should we be happy to allow the mentally ill to be exploited by the press? After all, it isn't fair on them, it certainly isn't fair on readers to continually be served up their fantasies rather than real news.