Donald Trump: the gift of loud that keeps on blaring For all those bemoaning the lack of noise in the Republican presidential sweepstakes, it’s time to get down on our knees and give thanks to Donald Trump, because whatever that man touches turns to loud. He’s the gift that keeps on blaring.

The drive-thru fast-food chain Checkers & Rally’s plans to build in the Baton Rouge area about a dozen restaurants that will eventually close and be converted to payday loan operations.

Japanese company Mitsubishi was criticised last night for saying sorry in a comedic Japanese accent, it was claimed last night.

Jeremy, Sunny, and Mike Honore wonder what perks would warrant analingus in exchange for a job at JL's Place. Sunny and Mike also re-enact a grandmother getting conned out of $13,000.

NEW YORK, New York (The Adobo Chronicles®) -   For far too long, white people have been absent from films, television shows, news anchor desks, advertising billboards and product labels. But finally, they are taking the spotlight away from people of color, thanks to a new MTV show, "White People." The documentary, produced by Filipino undocumented…

WASHINGTON (The Nil Admirari) - The Republican National Committee announced today it will be having all of its presidential candidates compete with each other to see who can make a child of illegal immigrants cry the fastest. The competition will be named "Only the Republican Who Makes a Child of Illegal Immigrant Parents Cry Fastest Can Truly Protect America," and will take place at 9pm EST on Thursday, August 20th near the El Paso, Texas border crossing.

At least four women were blinded and several more were seriously disgusted when an unidentified man wore open-toe sandals in the subway on Friday, according to WNYZ.

MANILA, Philippines (The Adobo Chronicles® ) -  Grammy Award-winning singer Chris Brown has been in trouble many times before, but this time around, he chose to get in trouble in a country that would not put up with his shenanigans. Brown was barred from leaving the Philippines because of a contract dispute, the official Philippines News Agency reported…

A herd of whining vaginas has petitioned the Tangipahoa Parish School Board to postpone this year’s start of school. Apparently, it’s too hot for their precious spawn to learn to read, write, and bully the weak.

Singers Blake Shelton and Miranda Lambert announced via a statement to The Associated Press on Monday that their four-year marriage is over. What do you think about this?

Is spare part surgery keeping the Queen and Prince Philip alive? Journalist claims dead royals 'stripped for spares' as Royal couple bid to outlive Prince Charles and prevent his accession to throne.

WASHINGTON (The Nil Admirari) - Today, Republican presidential candidate and former Governor of Texas Rick Perry announced he will be swapping his reading glasses for a monocle and a smoking pipe. The move was characterized by political observers as Perry conceding the reading glasses had failed to make him appear more intelligent to Americans.

SILICON VALLEY,  California (The Adobo Chronicles®) - A plan backed by venture capitalist Tim Draper to split California into six states has gained enough signatures to make the November 2016 ballot, the plan's backers say. On Tuesday, Draper told USA Today the campaign had garnered 1.3 million signatures, well over the approximately 808,000 needed. The signatures…

WASHINGTON (The Nil Admirari) - Earlier this evening, Republican presidential candidate Senator Lindsey Graham (R-SC) released 394 cockfighting videos allegedly related to an illegal cockfighting and gambling ring run by Donald Trump - another Republican presidential candidate. Trump quickly denied any role in illegal cockfighting or gambling, and said he "loves cocks" and would never put two roosters into a cockpit to brawl.

Battling cancer since he was five, Jake Doughty's illness never gave him a chance to go hunting or even fire a gun, but the 10 year-old still managed to take down a white tail buck before he died Monday.

Batavia, IL –  Researchers from a lab in Batavia recently reported that the number of pills in the world are quickly overtaking the human population.  For every one person, there are approximately six pills floating somewhere out there in the world.

HOLLYWOOD (TheSkunk.org) — Even the best of the best falter from time to time. Audience reaction to Steven Spielberg’s latest film, The Ride of Paul Revere, which debuted in selected theaters on Friday, was anger and confusion over sitting through a two-hour movie that was shot with the camera in the vertical, or “portrait,” format.

ITV has apologised for atrocities it committed in the 1970s, including Love Thy Neighbour and On The Buses.

Wake up, America! Open your eyes and look around! This country has gone from the cock of the walk to a bantamweight under this president!

MANILA, Philippines (The Adobo Chronicles®) - A bi-partisan majority of members of the Philippines' House of Representatives and Senate have rejected a second term for President NoyNoyAquino, or his successors. The constitution limits the presidential term to six years with no re-election. There has been a lot of speculation that the Aquino camp was trying to…