With Vacation, the new comedy starring Chris Hemsworth with his shirt off, opening this week in Lower under Haye, everyone is swooning at the buffness of the Hollywood superstar who came to Layer under Haye in August 2006 on a family holiday before he found fame.

NEW YORK CITY, NEW YORK (The Nil Admirari) - This morning, Republican presidential candidate and former Governor of Arkansas Mike Huckabee somehow escaped from the psychiatric wing he was residing in at Bellevue Hospital. Huckabee announced he wanted to make himself available to CNN so he could tell all of America he agreed with the government of Paraguay denying a 10-year-old rape victim in Asunción an abortion and forcing her to give birth to the child.

WASHINGTON, D.C. (The Adobo Chronicles® ) - If elected president of the United States, Republican candidate Donald Trump says he will deport all 11 million undocumented immigrants now living in the country.  And he wants to do more. He says he will seek to change the 14th Amendment that gives citizenship rights to all individuals born…

Rosie O'Donnell sent Fox News Channel's Megyn Kelly a gift basket for 1) Taking a shot at Donald Trump in the recent GOP debate, and 2) For giving her own ego a stroke or two by getting to hear her name on national TV again. It's no surprise Rosie hates Donald Trump, and the feeling is mutual.

Presidential hopeful Scott Walker unveiled a new plan today that would provide funding for Wall Street by using money raised from new college tuition fees.

DES MOINES, Iowa  (The Adobo Chronicles® ) - The state of Iowa holds a very special significance in any U.S. presidential elections. Because of the Iowa caucuses. The Iowa caucuses are an electoral event in which residents of the state of meet in precinct caucuses in all of its 1,682 precincts and elect delegates to…

WASHINGTON (The Nil Admirari) - Earlier today, Republican presidential candidate Senator Lindsey Graham (R-SC) warned Americans if they did not elect him president everyone would die. Graham asserted the United States would only be safe from "those very scary Muslims" under his watch.

WASHINGTON (The Nil Admirari): Earlier today, Republican presidential candidate and former Governor of Florida Jeb Bush announced his presidency would be a continuation of his brother George W. Bush's presidency in that he would send ground troops back to Iraq, reinstate torture in violation of American and international law, and make every other mistake made by his brother and more. Jeb promised Americans to ignore all of "the allegedly negative consequences" of his brother's presidency, and vowed to return America to "the golden age" of George W. Bush.

DES MOINES, Iowa (The Adobo Chronicles® ) -  After weeks of campaigning and not getting anywhere close to the large crowds that have marked rival Bernie Sanders' political stomps, Democratic presidential candidate Hilly Clinton is finally conceding. Sanders has been attracting crowds of up to 20,000 in his campaign appearances while Clinton has mostly focused on…

In an episode of Dragons' Den due to be broadcast by the BBC next month it has been revealed that the Greek Government appeared before the Dragons in an effort to secure much needed funds.

Smoke inhalation from wildfires can be a problem – except when it’s pot, it seems. California is in the midst of a biblical-like drought, and state leaders have had to find ingenious ways of preserving the little water they have left. On Wednesday, Los Angeles city officials launched their latest effort: Operation Cojones.

Office workers at TechDorling Inc. have spent the last year working hard to not broach the subject of the Black Lives Matter movement.

NEW YORK CITY, NEW YORK (The Nil Admirari) - Republican presidential candidate and billionaire Donald Trump met his "Uncle Bobby" at John F. Kennedy International Airport at 12:30 this morning. Trump flew his uncle in from Sumatra to help with his presidential campaign, and Uncle Bobby arrived with a large entourage of conservationists and primatologists, as well as large boxes full of fruit, bird eggs, bark, leaves, honey, shoots, and insects from home.

Boston, MA –  Last week, the great city of Boston was site to the annual PETA national conference.  You’d figure with so many radicals with a common purpose in one place, there would be nothing but agreement happening all over the place.

COLORADO (The Barbed Wire) - Doing a bang-up job of polluting the Animus River in Colorado last week has given the higher-ups at the Environmental Protection Agency (EPA) a new idea for bringing revenue to the out of control agency. The agency's incompetence has left the Animus a bright mustard-yellow color, full of chemical toxins.

AUSTIN, Texas--Governor Greg Abbott has responded to growing concerns from residents all across the state who believe the Perseids Meteor Shower to be a carefully orchestrated ruse that the Obama administration plans to use to steal their guns, abort their babies, smuggle disease-ridden brown people across their borders, marry their gays, and educate their children.…

NEW YORK, New York  (The Adobo Chronicles® ) - The word war between Republican presidential candidate Donald Trump and FOX News seems to be coming to an end, thanks to  an agreement recently made between Trump and FOX News Chairman Roger Ailes. Earlier in the week, Ailes was quoted as saying to Trump, 'We resolve…

NEW YORK CITY, NEW YORK (The Nil Admirari) - Fox News talking head Megyn Kelly announced two nights ago on her show The Kelly Factor she was going to take a ten day vacation. Kelly did not say why she was going on vacation on-air, but an anonymous source at Fox News informed TNA today Kelly was told by her boss Roger Ailes to "take some time off, forget about Donald Trump, and the death threats his supporters keep sending you."

Jesus issued a decree denouncing fantasy football today, effectively eliminating the hobby as a source of entertainment for devout Christians.

WASHINGTON (The Nil Admirari): Earlier today, the Republican Party offered to fly former Vice President Dick Cheney and former President George W. Bush to the Hague so they could go before the International Criminal Court (ICC) to face war crimes charges related to their illegal March 2003 invasion - and subsequent occupation - of Iraq. Republican National Committee Chairman Reince Priebus stated the only thing the GOP wanted in return from the Democratic Party was to have Democratic presidential candidate Hillary Clinton arrested for "a bunch of things."