NEW YORK CITY, NEW YORK (The Nil Admirari) - This morning, the Fox Broadcasting Company announced a new political reality show that will force contestants to work with each other respectfully to achieve common goals. "Work Together or Die" will take place in a wing of Bellevue Hospital in New York City, and boast contestants like Glenn Beck, Rush Limbaugh, and Bill O'Reilly.

LAS VEGAS, Nevada (The Adobo Chronicles®) - In the latest poll of the 2016 Republican candidates for president, Donald Trump has climbed up to the top spot, beating Jeb Bush by more than 2%. Trump and Bush are the only ones with double digit numbers in the crowded field of GOP presidential candidates. Little do voters know that…

64 year-old Kenny Butler, a pillar of the community in his hometown of Chesterfield, Illinois, is likely some kind of sex freak, most of his neighbors say.

WASHINGTON, D.C. (The Adobo Chronicles® ) - A day after its successful flyby, NASA’s New Horizons spacecraft sent back the first close-up photos of Pluto. The piano-sized spacecraft traveled nine years and three billion miles to study the dwarf planet and its five moons. (On Aug. 24, 2006, the International Astronomical Union (IAU), an organization of professional…

IOWA (The Nil Admirari) - Republican presidential candidate and former Governor of Arkansas Mike Huckabee unveiled his "Boys Will Be Boys" platform today. Huckabee's platform touts his moral superiority and excuses murder, rape, and a whole host of other crimes if a male offender claims to be a Christian, but brings down the full force of the law for women, religious minorities, and members of the LGBT community.

After decades of keeping its true identity a secret, Pluto has announced that it is not actually a planet. Pluto is a star.

What started out as jubilation over a momentous scientific achievement soon devolved into dangerous riots after NASA’s New Horizons spacecraft flew past Pluto.

Following criticism from both Democrats and fellow Republicans about his harsh tone, GOP presidential candidate Donald Trump says he will not alter his tone one bit, maintaining that what people see is the natural color of his skin.

WASHINGTON, D.C. (The Adobo Chronicles® )  - It's summertime and that means millions of Americans will be heading down to the beach to beat the warm temperatures. But this is also causing great alarm among U.S. health officials because of the fact that skin cancer, mostly from sun exposure, is the most common of all cancers.…

Pluto, the one time planet finally pictured by NASA after a probe traveled 9 zillion-gagillion-billion miles to see it close up for the first time yesterday, is also a Greek God who presides over the afterlife, it has been discovered.

GREECE (The Nil Admirari) - Earlier today, all Greeks who lived outside the capital of Athens decided it was time to break into the city-state model again to show the complete lack of cultural and political unity in Greece. The announcement was made by the Greek people in response to the Syriza government in Athens betraying Greeks by agreeing to a harsh bailout from the European Union (EU).

LAUREL, MD (TheSkunk.org) — After nine years and millions of dollars, NASA’s New Horizons spacecraft has sent back images of Pluto, revealing it to be “just another spherical, dusty orb.”

Commentary by Boustina Garubee -- I met Bill Cosby while on a business trip to Chicago about ten years ago...

FLORIDA (The Barbed Wire) - While most gays are now living a blissful, carefree life since the Supreme Court granted them the right to marry, some people are just never satisfied. This is a true but tragic story and will shake your faith in humanity to the core.

Britons to be Banned from Sniffing Own Farts under new Legislation Cracking Down on Legal Highs. Warnings From Experts that Low Quality Imported Farts Could be Responsible for Serious Illnesses and even Deaths Among Fart Sniffing Clubbers.

WASHINGTON (The Nil Admirari) - Earlier today, former Vice President Dick Cheney voiced his considerable displeasure with the nuclear agreement reached between the Obama administration and Iran. Cheney also announced his intention to travel to Iran and shoot Ayatollah Ali Khamenei - Supreme Leader of Iran - in the face with birdshot.

WASHINGTON, D.C. (The Adobo Chronicles® ) - Fake noodles. Fake eggs. Fake beef. Recent media reports show that some Chinese companies have been manufacturing fake food using both organic and inorganic ingredients. These fake food have yet to find their way to America (or have they, already?) Well, fake chicken from China may soon hit the…

A Camden-based graphics designer is to be the first person to travel around the world by unicycle. Asked if he was following in the footsteps of Columbus, Codey Grey said, 'He's so mainstream. You've probably never even heard of my favourite explorers.'

Portraying Atticus Finch as a racist in her new book, Harper Lee stirs controversy. “Ariana Grande molesting donuts, Atticus Finch a Ku Klux Klan pinup, it’s been a crazy few days for America,” said Noam Chomsky, the renowned linguist, philosopher, cognitive scientist, logician, political commentator, social justice activist and Dancing with the Stars finalist.

Planned Parenthood is issuing a nationwide recall of all parts purchased in the last ten years, admitting that they pose a serious public relations threat.