Check Please!
"Sigh. Why is it never 1960s Batman?" Fred Flunkee, Archivist
"I would have been happy with a woof rather than a yap." Jessie Krufts, Pancake Flipper
"Hmm. Is there a doggie wine list at the restaurant? Or do they always have water but they can choose the bowl?" Fred Flunkee, Dogger
"You talkin to me?" Fred Flunkee, Robert De Niro Impersonator
"Manni will have a forearm like Popeye's if he keeps that up." Kent Rugby, Gym Instructor
"My look is called 'Singing Barber Of The 1930s.'" Fred Flunkee, Retired Bargain Bin Man
"Ha ha that lid is broken or wasn't put on properly. I can't even open my dog proof dog food container." Fred Flunkee,Has Weak Fingers
"It's funnier the second time you watch it." Jimmy Popper, Surveyor
"Put the bowl on your head, little man, and do a little dance. Don't just sit there!!!" Jessie Krufts, Circus Trainer
"Yeah, pelican's have a mind of their own. Like pointy beaked cats." Jessie Krufts, Zoologist
"Like giant Gummy Bears but hairy!" Kent Rugby, Confectioner
"I just want to slip on some spandex trunks and go dancing with my new doggie friend." Kent Rugby, Hunkist
"My nightmare is that one of their little heads goes right up my shorts when I'm not looking." Jimmy Popper, Disasterologist
"Skyfall could be a poignant follow up video with the dog waiting for the thrown stick to fall from the sky for him to catch in the park. Slightly misty I'm thinking, lady dog watching on with her tongue out. By jingo this could work." Jimmy Popper, Music Video Ideas Man From The 1980s
"I would be invincible with trunks like that." Jimmy Popper, Trunks Designer
"Show him how to do a single summersault next." Jimmy Popper, Circus Trainer
"And the plot is better handled than Die Hard 5 too." Jimmy Popper, Cinema Owner
"It's nothing like him. Serge, do Trump next. Just put a wig on and say something stupid in a whiny simple voice." Jessie Krufts, Impersonator
"You have the opportunity to ask profound questions like what is it like to be a bird? Or what is it like to fly? Or is there a bird God? And all you get it to say is Hello and Hi? Missed opportunity. If aliens come down to earth don't let that woman go to greet them is all I'm saying." Jessie Krufts, Humpty Pusher

Since 2003, HumorFeed has been the web's best independent satire news and humor news hub. Our content is provided by an association of carefully selected writers, dedicated to providing some of the best and sharpest material online.

The web's best network of satire news sites
Bending the news until it breaks!


Get today's toon from