WASHINGTON, D.C. (The Adobo Chronicles) - In anticipation of Paul Ryan's formal election as the new Speaker of the U.S. House of Representatives tomorrow, his Chief of Staff, Dave Hoppe, released the Congressman's official photograph that will be hung in his office on Capitol Hill. "It is an accurate representation of what the congressman faces as he assumes…

Speaking in a Russian interview, former chairman of FIFA, Sepp Blatter, has admitted he was building an evil world empire like a typical bad guy in a James Bond movie. This just days following the Spectre premiere, the latest James Bond movie, in cinemas.

Republican presidential candidate Jeb Bush has a new look that reflects his “outsiderness” and “devil-may-care attitude,” says his newly appointed campaign manager.

Boulder, CO – Like many of us that have faced a valley in our career or our personal lives, Rick Santorum has been doing some soul searching.  

BOULDER, COLORADO (The Nil Admirari) - Earlier today, the Republican National Committee (RNC) announced tonight's presidential debate on CNBC will focus on continuing the flawed economic policies that have made wealthy Americans staggeringly wealthier over the last 35 years. In order to effectively reinforce the debate's plutocratic theme, CNBC announced it will not allow Americans to livestream the debate unless they have an overpriced cable or satellite subscription that includes the network.

Another terrible shooting at an American school. Hard to really understand how America can ignore a problem that affects them every single day. However, I’ve tried to do that over at The What & The Why, where I’ve written something about America’s gun culture and how it affects all of us.

Maybe this is the one those Heaven’s Gate Hale-Bopp folks were waiting for?

We will also be looking at repealing the Lords smoking ban, offering free alcohol between nine a.m. and midnight, removing the need for Lords to wear seatbelts and upping the speed limits their official cars can legally reach. It's the least we can do.'

Making fun of the headlines today, so you don’t have to The news doesn’t need to be complicated and confusing; that’s what any new release from Microsoft is for. And, as in the case with anything from Microsoft, to keep the news from worrying our pretty little heads over, remember something new and equally indecipherable.

MANILA, Philippines (The Adobo Chronicles) - The bitter political rivalry between the Marcoses and the Aquinos abruptly came to an end today, when Philippine President Noynoy Aquino granted absolute pardon to the late Ferdinand E. Marcos and his family, including Imelda Romualdez Marcos and their children, Senator Bongbong Marcos, Governor Imee Marcos and Irene Marcos. All…

DES MOINES, IOWA (The Nil Admirari) - Around noon today, Republican presidential candidate and retired neurosurgeon Dr. Ben Carson compared his lunch salad to slavery. The midday meal complaint followed Carson's increasingly common pattern of comparing things he disliked to slavery.

What he's really gunning for.

We’ve perseverated on this Libyan tragedy for so long that today, I would like to shift gears and celebrate Benghazi. Not the dead people part, but the ramifications. Your dogged fixation on this unfortunate event has created some wonderful fodder over the years and, like it or not, it’s only acted to solidify Madame President’s chances.…

‘Without all the black and white make-up and piercings it was impossible to recognise anyone.'

SAN FRANCISCO, California (The Adobo Chronicles) - Yesterday's announcement by the World Health Organization (WHO) that bacon and processed meats cause cancer will go down in history as the bleakest day in the culinary world. Reactions to the news ranged from disbelief to anger to frustration -- pretty much like the reactions we see in people…

"That would be even funnier if it was a person in a hamster suit. Sports mascots take notes." Jessie Krufts, Hamster Designer

Friends of a young black girl savagely beaten on camera by a cop are raising money to help him heal from the serious injuries he should have received.

Seattle, WA – A small but growing group of small business owners and consumers are creating anarchy in the great city of Seattle to prove a point to the government.  

HONOLULU, Hawaii (The Adobo Chronicles) - First, it was the Filipino longganisa and tocino  makers that were up in arms against the World Health Organization (WHO) for releasing a study that concludes processed meat causes cancer. Now, all of Hawaii is protesting against the international organization for one reason: SPAM musubi. SPAM, of course, is the canned processed…

WASHINGTON (The Nil Admirari) - Earlier today, Democratic presidential candidate and former Secretary of State Hillary Clinton proactively branded every American who refused to vote for her "a sexist." Clinton asserted if anyone disagreed with her on policy they were "likely a sexist," but any American who did not vote for her was "definitely a sexist."