Widely considered the most popular cereal box cartoon character of all-time, Toucan Sam has come under fire this week after an anonymous source reported that his brother is hungry, broke, and homeless in an Ecuadorian rain forest.

COLUMBUS, OHIO (The Nil Admirari) - Today, Republican presidential candidate and megalomaniac billionaire Donald Trump told voters he was an expert on wind power, and viewed wind as the most reliable and realistic renewable energy source. Trump pointed to the well-documented fact that his mouth routinely unleashed massive amounts of very loud, largely incoherent, inhumanly strong, and exceedingly angry hot air at campaign events and virtually every other place graced with his presence.

by Alexander Vosh.Latest War on Christmas escalation gives fading Fox News new life THE NORTH POLE — Earlier today, the Happy Holidays faction in the War on Christmas launched a surprise attack [more...]Subscribe to our monthly Humor Times magazine here, available worldwide, in print or digital format.

After painful negotiations, a group of teachers has today finally agreed how to allocate the bill from their 2013 Christmas lunch

NEW YORK, New York (The Adobo Chronicles) - Republican presidential candidate Donald Trump wanted so much to be named Time magazine's 'Person of the Year,' but when he got his wish, he declined the honor because it hurt his ego. Time editors picked Trump over online survey frontrunner Bernie Sanders and Nobel Prize winner Malala Yousafzai,…

On Thursday, Defense Secretary Brown and Army Gen. Martin Dempsey, chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff, signed an order that officially rescinded the ban on women serving in combat.

WASHINGTON, D.C. (The Adobo Chronicles) - Former U.S. Vice President Dick Cheney was busted for his role in war crimes committed during the administration of his former boss, George W. Bush. This is the first time that Cheney was made to answer for his crimes on U.S. soil.  He was busted at the U.S. Capitol. The…

WASHINGTON (The Nil Admirari) - Earlier today, American defense contractors predicted hundreds of thousands of American ground troops will win the imminent, expanded war against the Islamic State (ISIS) in Syria, Iraq, and probably elsewhere. The arms producers expected to make an acceptable profit before, during, and after the war, and defined "win" as the United States and its allies leaving a power vacuum in the region to guarantee future armed conflicts and demand for weapons.

WASHINGTON D.C. (The Barbed Wire) - Trying to put American's fears to rest about the possibility of bringing tens of thousands of Muslim refugees into the country from Syria, President Obama reassured the nation today that there wouldn't be any problems with his plan because Muslims "just don't radicalize once they get here."

Beginning July 1, the nation’s largest retailer will venture into cosmetic surgery for the first time when Walmart begins offering Breast Enhancement Surgery at all Super Walmart locations

"We don't want to be the Grinch who stole Christmas, just because you're on Santa's naughty watch list," says Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell.

A few years ago, a relative underwent major surgery. It was a bad time but eventually came the moment when we could visit. ‘So,’ I said, once the greetings were done and tears shed, ‘is there anything I can do?’ ‘Yes,’ replied my relative, ‘you can turn that [flipping] TV off!’ A monitor on an […]

“Did Planned Parenthood fund the Flux Capacitor with tax payer dollars?” —John Q. Republican

After Hilary Benn's rousing pro-bombing Daesh in Syria speech on Wednesday, the nation has woken to the shock that they had no idea a man could be called Hilary.

Corporate monopolies are experiencing a surge in the urge to merge. Control of market after market — from cable TV to chickens, banking to washing machines ...

CUPERTINO, California (The Adobo Chronicles) - The charity bug has finally caught up with tech companies in the Silicon Valley. Following yesterday's announcement by Facebook's Mark Zuckerberg and wife Priscilla Chan that they will be donating 99% of their wealth to charity, Apple has followed suit with an even better deal. Apple CEO Tim Cook is…

MENLO PARK, California (The Adobo Chronicles) - What a difference a new-born baby makes. To welcome the birth of their baby daughter Max, Mark Zuckerberg and Priscilla Chan announced a new initiative in which they will donate 99% of their wealth to charity. Most of that money, in excess of $45 Billion, is coming from Facebook,…

NASA Scientists released information, along with a Top Secret report, concerning the recent discovery of human remains spotted laying on the surface of the Earth’s moon.

"And the plot is better handled than Die Hard 5 too." Jimmy Popper, Cinema Owner

Christian forces remain under siege in a bloody stalemate military experts are calling the most pivotal battle in the War on Christmas.