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PROVIDENCE, RHODE ISLAND (The Nil Admirari) - Earlier today, a city clerk in the tax collection office of Providence, Rhode Island announced his religious beliefs would not allow him to process any tax payments from uncircumcised males. Seth Weiss, an Orthodox Jew, invited all male residents of Providence to bring him a doctor's note stating they were circumcised, or take advantage of his offer of a "complimentary circumcision" if they wanted to pay their taxes and avoid non-payment penalties.
ROWAN COUNTY, Kentucky (The Adobo Chronicles® ) - Much of the media focus has been on Kim Davis, the Rowan County clerk who is now in jail for refusing to issue marriage licenses to same-sex couples, in violation of a high court order But in the same county clerk office, there is another Davis, Nathan, who…
From Our Business Correspondent: The Chinese financial crisis in China this week has not led to any noticeable increase in the sales of albums from 1980s chart toppers China Crisis, latest financial figures seen by this newspaper show.
Islamic State has declared today that UNESCO attempts to recreate the Temple of Bel using the virtual Lego game, Minecraft, would be "destroyed" by IS gamers accessing and corrupting UNESCO servers.
Kim Davis promises to end the hypocrisy and start enforcing “God’s law” in all cases. Rowan County Clerk Kim Davis is still not issuing marriage licenses, invoking “God’s authority,” despite a rebuke from the Supreme Court on her lawyer’s appeal.
NEW YORK, New York (The Adobo Chronicles® ) - Earlier this week, the Rev. Al Sharpton declared that “people that were from Puerto Rico all would have to go back if their parents were undocumented.” In other words, Sharpton believes that Puerto Ricans are not  U.S. citizens. Soon enough, Republican presidential candidate Donald Trump, while speaking to a…
WASHINGTON (The Nil Admirari) - Today, excerpts from former Vice President Dick Cheney's presidential memoir titled "Leading America From Underneath The White House" were released. The 33,000-page book absent of pictures and attempts to personify Cheney was heavy on its criticism of George W. Bush, which the text referred to as "King Meddler."
LSU’s live tiger mascot said he’s more willing to attend home football games with sophomore quarterback Brandon Harris at the helm.
ROWAN COUNTY, KENTUCKY (The Nil Admirari) - Earlier today, Rowan County Clerk Kim Davis announced she only wanted to choose what laws to follow, because of "God or something." Davis explained her position as she continued to refuse gay couples a marriage license after the Supreme Court declined to exempt her from doing her job, because of her cited reason of "stuff."
DES MOINES, Iowa (The Adobo Chronicles® ) - Nothing will stop Donald Trump's desperate quest to become the next president of the United States -- not Hillary Clinton, not the Mexicans, not the Chinese, not Fox News' Megyn Kelly, not Jorge Ramos, not CNN. Not even fellow Republican candidate Ben Carson. Latest numbers coming out of…
Each year Gaston offers his students the chance to skip the rest of the year and earn an A in the course if they can produce a perpetual motion machine by the last day of school.
It has long been rumoured that veteran entertainer Sir Bruce Forsyth has led a double life. "You don't think he got that gong for his fumbled autocued ad libs, do you?" asked an espionage expert today.
Making fun of the headlines today, so you don’t have to The news doesn’t need to be complicated and confusing; that’s what any new release from Microsoft is for. And, as in the case with anything from Microsoft, to keep the news from worrying our pretty little heads over, remember something new and equally indecipherable...
Experts warn of 'erotic apocalypse' if public given access to recently uncovered ancient pornography. UK government seeks to suppress addictive classical smut amid fears that its potency could destroy civilisation.
You might assume from my presidential candidacy and position in the US Senate that I was born with a silver spoon in my mouth. Not so.
Despite their best attempts to demolish the Temple of Bel, the Islamic State has been unable to explode a variety of stacked geometric shapes. Although the historical city of Palmyra boasts more than 1,000 columns, 500 tombs and many coloured squares - the military group has repeatedly 'topped out' to the soundtrack of the 'Dance of the Sugar Plum Fairy'.
An interview with editorial cartoonist Brian Gable When you’re due some money and you’re informed that “the check’s in the mail,” there’s always the possibility that the sender is indulging in a bit of prevarication and wishful thinking. But when you know that Brian Gable’s brilliant editorial cartooning is invariably in the Toronto Globe...
We salute state Sen. Elbert Guillory, candidate for Louisiana lieutenant governor. Within only a few years of leaving the Democratic Party to become a Republican, Guillory is now the official utterer of racial slurs for the entire Louisiana GOP.
Rapper Kanye West used the VMA Awards on MTV last night to announce that he is running for president of the United States. What do you think about this?

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