Hollywood, CA – (satireworld.com)

Wheel of Fortune letter turner Vanna White, who has been playing “Hangman” with America for thirty years, admitted that she is functionally illiterate and cannot read any of the puzzles. White claims that “I just touch the squares that they light up, but I wouldn’t know a C from a V from a Z if they paid me (and they do pay me pretty good!).”

Cognitive distortions are prominent on both sides of today’s political aisles, but one side is accelerating in this area like a tachyon particle in a meth lab. This is today’s scheissgiest, as I like to call it. From a psychiatric standpoint, Republicans represent the full diagnostic spectrum. I’d suggest they drop their elephant symbol for the rainbow were…

The story was quite hard to concentrate on, although it possibly featured a number of less photogenic subjects such as oppressed Palestinians and starving Africans, but ooh, look, there she is again from that rom-com 'He's Just Not That Into You,' the one where she goes skinny-dipping.

U.S. corporations owe $600 billion in taxes Carl Icahn, noted corporate predator and takeover specialist who made billions of dollars in corporate deals, has recently begun pushing a charitable cause.

WASHINGTON (The Nil Admirari) - Earlier today, the Federal Reserve confirmed the trillions of dollars it had printed and handed over to the financial sector to stimulate the economy since the 2008 financial crisis went almost exclusively to the richest Americans - and stayed there making them even wealthier. The Fed dubbed the unsustainable shadow economy it was running the "Weekend at Bernie's Economy" due to all of the strings it had to continue to pull in order to make it look like the economy was alive and working well for everyone when it only benefited... extremely rich investors.

"So many of our reporters cut their teeth on American gun violence," said an angry CNN V.P. "How the hell are we supposed to fill air time??"

Orlando, Florida – (satireworld.com)
Welcome to SatireWorld’s premier edition of it’s annual swim suit cover. The highly anticipated cover was shot at great expense at fabulous and trendy Miami Beach Florida. The winning model for 2016 is 34 year old Cate Upton from Chicago, Illinois who models the latest in fat girl beach wear. Upton beat out scores of big beautiful women in the much sought out beach wear competition snagging the year’s coveted cover.

A Syrian refugee living in Berlin who made a perilous journey to Europe after losing his entire family in his country’s civil war is nevertheless very horny.

Scientists looking for alien life on other planets have been looking in the wrong place, according to an independent telescope owner and his mates.

South Dakota – (satireworld.com)

December 29, 2015 marked the 125th Anniversary of the murder of 297 Sioux Indians at Wounded Knee Creek on the Pine Ridge Indian Reservation in South Dakota.

WASHINGTON D.C. (The Barbed Wire) - White House doctors have confirmed that President Obama strained several muscles in his arms today, and even tore a tendon in his shoulder area, while overreaching in putting together his newest gun control executive orders. The president has been ordered to rest his skinny arms and reduce the movement of his left shoulder.

Tasty Scoops Ice Cream Parlor in Dansville, Tennessee announced this week that they will offer free ice cream cones for life to all US combat veterans.

WASHINGTON (The Nil Admirari) - Today, TNA released the results of a study on what would happen if a federal building was seized by a group of armed Black Americans last weekend. Its conclusion was if such a group seized a federal building and its members dared federal authorities to attack them their funerals would be ending right about now.

Washington, DC – (satireworld.com)
Barack Obama issued his latest presidential order only to have it met by laughter and derision from Republicans, Conservatives, and every straight male in the thinking world. Presidential order 6969FU states that “Due to her diligent service in government, her selfless dedication to the people of her Congressional District, to California, and to the United States of America, and to the sacrifices and gray hairs brought on by her tireless efforts to assist and aid her fellow men, Nancy Pelosi is hereby granted the status of MILF.”

Donald Trump claims that Cruz is a Nazi, transvestite love child.

Pyongyang, DPRK—The supreme leader of the Democratic People’s Republic of Korea announced today the successfully detonation of an H-Bomb, the first such thermonuclear detonation in the country’s history. The U.S. Air Force immediately deployed a WC-135 Constant Phoenix aircraft as a radiation “sniffer” plane to test the properties of the radiation cloud created by the blast.…

Shoreditch resident Melvin Sharp was left 'saddened and disappointed' after the 2015 Nobel Peace Prize was awarded to the Tunisian National Dialogue Quartet.

Mr Sharp, a part time graphic designer, had spent the previous 12 months faithfully signing 157 petitions that have appeared on his Facebook and Twitter feeds, hoping that his very public activity may get him noticed by the Nobel committee.

Our hard-hitting website investigates yet more conspiracy theories! Conspiracy Theories is the hard-hitting website that isn’t afraid to investigate and expose the dark forces that seek to prey..

NEW YORK, New York (The Adobo Chronicles) - Republican presidential candidate Donald Trump is undeniably a birther: he has continuously questioned Barack Obama's citizenship, claiming the president was born in Kenya and should not have been qualified to run for U.S. president. Fast forward to 2016. Trump is running against Senator Ted Cruz who appears to…

Hollywood, CA – (satireworld.com)
Director Michael Moore’s Hollywood production of ‘American Snacker’ has finished production and is headed for the big screen in a theater near you sometime in May, said studio executive Morris Freeman.

Freeman admits it’s the left’s answer to the popular but controversial Clint Eastwood movie ‘American Sniper’ that many feel is a true contender for an Oscar award, but has been the source of rabid criticism from liberals and their supporters.