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ROWAN COUNTY, KENTUCKY (The Nil Admirari) - Today, Mathew Staver - the lawyer representing jailed Rowan County Clerk Kim Davis, who refuses to issue marriage licenses to same-sex couples out of hatred for America and the Constitution - announced he had "never actually read" the Constitution or "learned about the Supreme Court" prior to Sunday when he "made the time" to do so. The former Dean of the Liberty University School of Law confessed, "I have made a terrible mistake, and a complete ass of myself for claiming the Supreme Court does not have the authority to order federal and state offi
CUPERTINO, California (The Adobo Chronicles® ) - The stage is set for Apple's big announcement of its new products.  September 9 is the date when CEO Tim Cook unveils the new smart phones and tablets which would definitely seal his company's status as the leader in computer technology. While much of the speculation revolves around the…
Lake Jackson, TX – Ron Paul has given up his bid to become Commander In Chief and frankly doesn’t have high hopes for his son, Rand.
WASHINGTON (The Nil Admirari) - This morning, Republican presidential candidate and Governor of Wisconsin Scott Walker announced his campaign would be running a Labor Day sale on all its lead-based Chinese merchandise assembled by child laborers. Walker supporters who acted today will get 30% off all patriotic-themed Walker 2016 items, receive free shipping, and be gifted a video of Scott Walker burning prominent late 19th century and early 20th century labor organizer Mary Harris "Mother" Jones in effigy.
A medicated 16 year-old boy calmly strolled into a Dick's Sporting Goods in Tempe, Arizona and shot everyone inside this afternoon, killing 7 and wounding 5.
"That is terrifying if you reverse it. Eeek. Attacked by a squawking dead duck flying through the air into his hand... I won't sleep for a week after watching that backwards." Jessie Krufts, Producer
NEW YORK, New York (The Adobo Chronicles® ) - Republican presidential candidate Donald Trump today accused Israel's Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu of being a 'copycat.' Israel has begun building a fence along part of the country’s eastern border with Jordan as Syrian civil war refugees and other migrants flee their countries. Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu said Sunday:…
Responding to mockery she faced after saying that immigrants should learn to “speak American” if they want to live in the U.S., Sarah Palin is arguing that she has been unfairly maligned by the media.
The BBC started filming the prequel to Lady Chatterley's Lover, by DH Lawrence, in Lower under Haye, Monday, sources close to the kennels have revealed.
GRAYSON, KENTUCKY (The Nil Admirari) - Earlier today, hundreds rallied outside of the Carter County Detention Center where Rowan County Clerk Kim Davis had been held since Thursday for contempt of court for refusing to issue a marriage license to any same-sex couple. Supporters prayed for Davis, pledged thousands of dollars to her, and were in unanimous agreement that "freedom of religion would not be under attack" if "Jesus Christ was president again."
Barney Google googled Google just to ogle the googles about Gooble.
The googles that Google googled had oodles of googles about Google.
There is a gargantuan glossary of googles about Googles.
Gaggles of Google groupies google Google all the time.
NEW YORK, New York (The Adobo Chronicles® ) - You can't run for president of the United States and be silent about a worsening international crisis like the exodus of Syrian refugees trying  to escape torture and violence perpetrated by a repressive regime. But for Republican presidential candidate Donald Trump, it is such a huge dilemma…
WASHINGTON (The Nil Admirari) - Today, the results of a TNA survey of registered Republicans who lived in poverty in Alabama, Mississippi, and Louisiana were released. The numbers showed a staggering 87% of respondents favored cutting taxes for the wealthiest Americans, because they were "job creators" who needed even more money before trickle-down economics could rain money on a collapsing middle class and growing poor population.
SACRAMENTO, California (The Adobo Chronicles® ) - Forget about the proposed ballot initiative creating four Californias. How about making the Golden State an independent republic? It's just a matter of time before the world's eighth largest economy  will become a country separate from the rest of the United States. Already, there is a growing consensus especially among…
BBC News watchers have been warned to expect 24 hour Owen Jones, with possible outbreaks of Russell Brand, as the El Corbyno media storm shows no sign of abating.
Union-busting to enrich greedy owners should not be celebrated. Occasionally, I see something that is so bizarre, so out of place, so wrong that I have to assume I’m hallucinating. For example, I could have sworn I was delusional when I heard about the National Park Service’s Pullman National Monument in Chicago. George Pullman?
PROVIDENCE, RHODE ISLAND (The Nil Admirari) - Earlier today, a city clerk in the tax collection office of Providence, Rhode Island announced his religious beliefs would not allow him to process any tax payments from uncircumcised males. Seth Weiss, an Orthodox Jew, invited all male residents of Providence to bring him a doctor's note stating they were circumcised, or take advantage of his offer of a "complimentary circumcision" if they wanted to pay their taxes and avoid non-payment penalties.
ROWAN COUNTY, Kentucky (The Adobo Chronicles® ) - Much of the media focus has been on Kim Davis, the Rowan County clerk who is now in jail for refusing to issue marriage licenses to same-sex couples, in violation of a high court order But in the same county clerk office, there is another Davis, Nathan, who…
From Our Business Correspondent: The Chinese financial crisis in China this week has not led to any noticeable increase in the sales of albums from 1980s chart toppers China Crisis, latest financial figures seen by this newspaper show.

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