In an unprecedented scandal that has the U.S. Census Bureau reeling, it has been revealed that New Hampshire is actually a small state of no particular significance.

ANN ARBOR, MICH. — Michigan Wolverines head coach Jim Harbaugh has announced that he will open his home as a foster pare…

Cologne, Germany (satireworld.com)

Oh, here we go! This shit is barely even worth refuting. Look, you may talk about ‘freedom of dancing, freedom of singing, freedom of whatever,’ but let me tell you something, you hateful bigot. Freedom of speech demands accountability; hate speech isn’t freedom of speech. By definition! So, by that very logic, freedom of gallivanting around also demands accountability.

David Cameron, still the prime minister, has sorted that Europe thing out he said he would, according to David Cameron today.

CONCORD, NH (The Barbed Wire) - Maggie Hassan, governor of New Hampshire, has issued a state of emergency for the entire state of New Hampshire. The governor said the state has become saturated with political ads, with reports of some needing to be rescued from said ads. 9-1-1 operators say calls are coming in from people screaming that they are drowning in political ads.

"The F-35 can be utilized about twelve times every year. In between these missions it will require weeks of maintenance to address the damage it sustained from being exposed to direct sunlight, rain, wind, and the Earth's atmosphere," explained Secretary of Defense Ashton B. Carter.

PORTLAND, OR — That's because as of yesterday, Bullseye Glass Co., located at SE 21st & Powell, temporarily ceased the practice of pumping the two toxic carcinogens into the air at dozens of times the maximum safe level.

'The family has been waiting many years for this piece of paper...' at this point he started searching his pockets and looking worried.

Tampa Bay, FL—Clint Eastwood’s chair is once again making a bit of a stir on the campaign trail. The chair, best known for its appearance during the 2012 republican National Convention, told reporters it has received several calls from republican frontrunners regarding the possibility of joining their ticket. The chair was pivotal in helping Clint…

The Center for Disease Control went into emergency session today to counter what one source called “the galloping Affluenza epidemic” sweeping through the nation’s ruling class. First detected 2013 in the case of 17-year old Ethan Crouch...

“Talk about betrayal,” fumed Prescott Harris, of Eastport, Maine. “Clarissa promised to love, honor, and obey, not vote for some socialist Jew.”

And Trump had better think twice about being mean to any son of Barbara.

SANTA CLARA, CA — Peyton Manning may not be sure yet about his future in football, but he’s sure about the car his close…

Hollywood, Ca – (Satireworld.com)

Pubic health officials are looking into reports that the Zika virus scare story pandemic has been sexually transmitted during intercourse with the Welsh movie star, mostly via exposure to gnat semen.

"Just look at how much fun this walrus is having," stated Palin, who sat in a golf cart wrapped in what appeared to be chicken wire while the flippered marine mammal she named Buttercup growled, grunted, and whistled.

As part of the modernization programme, dissertations and PhD's will be reduced in length, and will now be expected to come in at under 140 characters.

Uh oh, looks like Samuel is off his meds again.

The news doesn’t need to be complicated and confusing; that’s what any new release from Microsoft is for.

DES MOINES, Iowa (The Adobo Chronicles) - Former First Lady and Secretary of State Hillary Clinton is the first woman ever to win the Iowa Caucus, her razor edge-thin margin over Senator Bernie Sanders nothwithstanding. Of course, the Clinton campaign and the liberal news media can spin Tuesday's Iowa Caucus results every which way, buy history…

A libertine Texas man is the first confirmed case of the Zika virus being transmitted via sexual contact with a vector.