Beijing, China
For the fourth time this year, a murky haze has descended over north China, leaving residents of Beijing choking on toxic smog. China’s air hasn’t been this bad since 1954, according to the state-run People’s Daily newspaper.
China, who prides itself on cutting edge technology, ranks just above Mumbai, India as the most polluted air quality.

Vardy lookalike Lee Chapman was in London visiting friends when a team official pulled up alongside him and invited him to visit Emirates Stadium. Thinking it was a joke, Chapman acquiesced to the offer.

Londoners warned of threat posed to Christmas shoppers by gang of crazed dwarves dressed as Christmas elves. Police claim that evil elves are targeting people buying and giving inappropriate and disappointing gifts for relatives.

(SatireWorld.com)
The world’s most popular rock and roll band has agreed to play at President-elect Donald Trump’s inauguration on January 20th, 2017. This ends weeks of speculation as to who will buck the boycott placed on popular stars and celebrities who have been pressured by Democrat supporters to ignore Trump’s victory and disclaim his Presidency.

Prentice has been off the booze for a full week but tonight she plans to enjoy the sweet of caress of the numbing properties of her one true love.

Right wing talk radio, Fox News and a lot of angry, foaming
at the mouth people egged on by them would have you believe that there is a war on Christmas. They insist that the greeting, "Happy Holidays" is part of a plot to ban the observance from public life. One of the targets of their rage has been Starbucks... Have a look at what I found!

WASHINGTON, D.C. (The Adobo Chronicles, Washington Bureau) - In order to address any issue of conflict of interest between his personal business and the presidency, Donald Trump has just announced that he will dissolve his foundation. This means that  beginning at his January 20 presidential inauguration, Trump will no longer be seen in public wearing the…

In what many agree may be too little too late, Gov. John Bel Edwards has signed a measure banning any and all memes containing characters from the cartoon Spongebob Squarepants from being posted from any IP address within the state of Louisiana.

Brian Haldane helps Jeremy White and Sunny Weathers start off another year of episodes by reminiscing about the good ol’ not-so-stabby days of Tigerland.

An increasing number of people in the UK are declining to express definite opinions when asked about complex issues of which they know little.

President-elect Donald Trump said yesterday that he wants to see English become the official language in all fifty states. "We must not allow ourselves to become a nation of Babels, like Canada, or Hawaii, which has two official languages: English and Kenyan,” said Mr. Trump.

WASHINGTON D.C. (The Adobo Chronicles, Washington Bureau) - Supporters of Hillary Clinton have taken their meme and hashtag, "imwithher" all the way to the former secretary of state's nomination victory on Tuesday night, but U.S. House Speaker Paul Ryan maintained his own meme of "imwithhim." And no, he wasn't referring to Clinton's rival Bernie Sanders.  He…

The world collectively woke up to a horrifying reality as they quickly discovered that 2017 started all over again.

CALIFORNIA (The Barbed Wire) - As soon as his WINO (Wife In Name Only) Hillary racked up enough delegates to secure the presumptive presidential nomination for the Democrats, Bill Clinton announced he will begin transitioning to a woman in the event that he becomes First Lady this fall.

Should convicted criminals who die before they've completed their sentences be brought back from the grave to finish their punishment? Newspaper suggests voodoo be employed to bring back as zombies offenders attempting to cheat justice through death.

Project Cockeyed Optimists topped the polls this week for the first time with 55% of voters saying they supported it.

The pound slumped and shares ricocheted off the walls in certain places on the downward spiral of financeageddon.

WASHINGTON, D.C. (The Adobo Chronicles, Washington Bureau) - Just in! The Moscow Ballet has confirmed that it would be performing during Donald Trump's January 20 Inauguration! This information was confirmed by WikiLeaks.

‘An apple a day will only keep the doctor away if you eat it,’ said Doctor Zaffa. ‘If you administer it anally then you’re going to need to see a doctor immediately.’

New York, NY - (satireworld.com)

Two hundredweight of Botox impounded at a Saudi camel beauty pageant was redirected to Clinton Foundation orifices this morning ahead of its upcoming annual Valentines Day bash.

What academia needs is to throw in some pillow talk after. Time to relax, light a cigarette, and sort through things. Maybe towel off some. Promise to text each other later.