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Every day until Thursday, there’ll be a new instalment in our latest “Who Said it First?” quiz series. Previously, it was Tony Blair and Hitler. This time, it’s the Garcon-Wonder, Emmanuel Macron. On the fourth and final day, the quiz answers will appear. Make sure to tell your friends; and feel free to share the […]
Theresa May has excited fans by re-energising her reign with a series of inter-cut training shots, accompanied by the theme tune to Steptoe and Son. Stripped to the waist, her fetlocks flowing in the wind, the Maybot 2000 ran in slow motion through a field of genetically modified wheat, followed by repeatedly dropping a dispatch...
Comedian Kathy Griffin is interviewed by our intrepid radio talk show host, Jerry Duncan.

ANNOUNCER Live from under a rock in your backyard, it’s The Jerry Duncan Show.

JERRY Good morning listeners nationwide. Is it a good morning? We’ll soon find out.
Securing the southern hemisphere has been quite difficult. Dealing with all these aliens coming through the sky has been a challenge for the Terrestrial Emperor. Then, there is the pressing problem of mutants being born.  The world has seen a series of conflicts over the years and continues to struggle with how to solve this problem. “I knew my dream had to come true one day: mutants and humans should be able to set aside their differences and have a sandwich together,” says Virginia Steele, a theoretical physicist living in Las Vegas, NV. “I mean there I was on my way to gamble the rest of m
Pasadena, CA – (
Rose Bowl Parade officials sent an official notice to members of the elite North Korean Army’s women’s precision marching cadre that has angered North Korean strongman, Kim Sung Un. The letter gave official notice that due to recent international nuclear tensions, the participation of the 5,000 member all women North Korean precision marching army will not be allowed to travel to Southern California. The annual parade showcases the annual Rose Bowl football spectacular held in Pasadena each January 1st.
Somewhere in North Korea – (
North Korea threatened the United States on Thursday with a preemptive ‘retalitory march’ by 100,000 North Korean soldiers, raising the level of rhetoric while the U.N. Security Council considers new sanctions against the reclusive country.
North Korea has accused the United States of using military drills in South Korea as a launch pad for a nuclear war and has scrapped the armistice with Washington that ended long marches by weary soldiers in the 1950-53 Korean Marcher’s War.
Inventors Gregory Hager and Nicolas Padoy discovered an artificial way to get robots and their operators to collaborate by changing their mode of interaction. This has to be the greatest collaboration since eggs met bacon. They called their apparatus the Human Machine Collaborative (HMC) system.
Anvils, molten steel, but not oversized hammers, are moderately starred this month, as are oversized hats and trombones.

Women who inadvertently purr and men who grunt are badly starred particularly in the shower.

Beware the tolling of the bell for which you previously asked whom it tolled. Nothing good will come of it.
Our kids are often more perceptive than we give them credit for, and as any parent raising a child in today's web connected world already knows, it's nearly impossible to shield them from the world's most unpleasant truths. The fact that the president of their country and the most powerful man in the world is literally, certifiably mentally ill, for example, can be a difficult topic to broach, but is one that is immensely important.
New York, NY – (
On Friday’s broadcast of HBO’s “Real Time,” host Bill Maher stated that President Trump is engaging in dehumanization of the media in a manner that is comparable to Rwanda and Nazi Germany. The remarks came right on cue after similar scripted statements were broadcast by CNN, MSNBC, and by George Stefanopolous on ABC.
"The moon is just exactly the right size to fit in front of the Sun which is millions of miles behind it? Give over if you think that is a random occurrence," said a man wearing robes, standing by a river and with angelic music playing behind him, this morning.
The Garcon-Wonder Emmanuel Macron is facing some stiff challenges in times to come. Not least, the somewhat superficially sinister character of some of his pronouncements. Can you work out which quotes are from Macron, and which are from Mussolini? 1. The status quo leads to self-destruction. 2. Socialism is a fraud, a comedy, a phantom, […]
Dunkin' Donuts Energy Punch mixes the sugar and caffeine of a can of Monster Energy with the additional sugar of Coolata syrup. Talk about a jolt!
Street workers and homeless teenagers have spoken of their excitement at how the self-drive service will speed up their untimely and tragic demise.
Tweet Tower—Members of President Trump’s White House are not enjoying themselves and this is becoming even more apparent when it’s their turn on the old chopping block. Whether staffers leave voluntarily or are forced out, parting Team Trump is such sweet sorrow …well, except the sweet part. This is why Chief of Staff General John Kelly was determined to…
We survived our Italian summer – it was tough, but someone’s got to do it! It’s hard to learn even the most basic tourist phrases of another language (hello; excuse me; pardon the fart; where is the toilet?; waiter, the check!; please remove your thumb from my nose) in 4 weeks.
Hope you’re enjoying the new quiz! How many did you get right last time??? 9. We go to battle against the plutocratic and reactionary democracies of the West. 10. If the middle class thinks that we are going to be their lightning rods, they are mistaken. 11. I am not some mere liberal movement… I […]
After I wrote my friend Dave a letter of recommendation, his dating dry spell ended immediately. Now I'm giving you permission to use the same template!
It is not clear what his motive was or if he will be formally charged by police, though a spokesman said that alcohol may well have been involved.

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