Knick and James were forced to abandon their session due to technical garbage, but thankfully Carole is ready (and required by law) to fill in this week. The couple talk mobile gaming, prostitution, and rule 34. Don’t worry, Sailor Moon makes an appearance as well.

A new national study released Monday by the Robert Wood Johnson Foundation lists Louisiana as the state least prepared to respond to a major health emergency or disaster. What do you think about this?

Almost immediately after I shut my door, I heard the door on the other side fly open and slam shut. The unseen tech on the other side was very eager to steal my pee.

The Louisiana Supreme Court ruled Friday that a noted Baton Rouge jackwagon with a law degree may return to making a mockery of the nation’s justice system. The court ruled 4-3 in favor of ending disbarred personal injury attorney and prolific ass clown E. Eric Guirard’s seven-year hiatus from turning arguably the world’s greatest legal system into a hackneyed joke.

Maybe they’re bored with more traditional, relatively civilized campaigns to become the leader of the free world. Maybe they’re spoiled by today’s myriad entertainment options and want this race to be a monthslong political version of Max Max: Fury Road. Maybe they want this year’s presidential race to be the kind of shit show future historians will point to as the reason why we decided to let robots run the country.

Faced with a slowdown in sales and resulting decline in its previously boundless profits, Apple is believed to be secretly planning a new version of its hugely successful iPhone. Tapping into current concerns about the environment, it is understood that the designers will endeavour, whenever possible, to use natural materials in its construction.

Will the ghost dog, Copper, ecto-piddle on team Search Truth Quest’s fire hydrant prop thingie?  

It turns out that I’m not the only person who dreams about her job at the library. I work at the circulation desk at a suburban library. I recently had a dream in which one of our most challenging patrons apologized for being such a nuisance, then meekly paid all her fines.

The detailed report claims that the deceased musical genius had levels of funk in his bloodstream way beyond the norm and that his flamboyance count was off the charts.

Shrieking in terror in the morning is normal for many Americans but waking up and seeing Trump’s face when you look in the mirror is not.

The Centers for Disease Control is warning students at Morgan Peppercock High School not to have sex with Laura Mishler, a recently transferred junior from Landry School District in Harrington.

Oxford, Alabama (The Adobo Chronicles, Washington Bureau) - A small Alabama city has passed an ordinance making it illegal for transgender people to use public restrooms that don't correspond to the biological sex listed on their birth certificate. Oxford Council President Steven Waits said the ordinance, passed Tuesday, is in response to Target's new restroom policy. The retail…

In a press conference only slightly more unusual than the norm for The Donald, Trump had the cardboard cutout wheeled out on stage and proclaimed it to be infinitely better qualified for the job of Vice President, as well as considerable better looking than Carly Fiorina.

Donald Trump is considering Cap'n Crunch as his running mate after weeks of Crunch providing him with superior foreign policy advice.

South Yorkshire Police has admitted responsibility for everything that has ever been wrong with the great city of Liverpool and the cheeky little scallywags who call it home. The police will also retrospectively apologise for any other grievances Liverpudlians may remember or dream up in future.

Last week we already called Trump …an asshole.

Today, Republican presidential candidate and fascism-friendly billionaire Donald Trump dominated primary elections in Connecticut, Delaware, Maryland, Pennsylvania, and Rhode Island. In all five states, he also won the support of nearly 80% of...

The findings were unearthed as hype for the all-female led cast of the new GhostBusters movie begins in earnest. Many have cried foul over the central premise of the plot, citing that women couldn’t realistically handle the rigours of fighting phantoms.

AUSTIN (The Barbed Wire) - Donald Trump is feeling great these days after sweeping victories in five northeast states, and creeping closer to the magic number of 1237 delegates that are needed to secure the Republican nomination. However, Republican National Chair Reince Priebus says, "Not so fast."

"The announcement that Ted Cruz and Carly Fiorina are running mates really surprised me. Now I am more confused than anything, and the rest of the country is right there with me," explained Republican strategist Mark Kinness.