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KALINGA, Philippines (The Adobo Chronicles, Baguio Bureau) – Tattoo enthusiasts will easily recognize the name Whang-Od.  She’s the 100-year-old (and last remaining) Filipina tattoo artist (mambabatok) from Buscalan, Tinglayan, Kalinga, Philippines.
FLORIDA - Congressional candidate Bettina Rodriguez Aguilera drew ridicule this week when she said that she was taken aboard senator Ted Cruz’s spaceship when she was a child.
Seoul, South Korea – (
Today at dusk over 45 divisions of crack North Korean troops swarmed over the DMZ and attacked the capitol city of South Korea setting fires, looting stores and shops ending a 60 year armistice that was frequently broken over disputed boundaries and vast political reunification issues.
Los Angeles, CA – (
Mark your calendars…Organizers of the Halloween Night Thriller Dance have signed up almost two-hundred thousand flash mob dancers who promise to dance at the grave site of Michael Jackson in an effort to revive the pop star from death.
US House of Representatives – (
According to the Speaker of the House, it’s not about any ‘war on women,’ but merely a ‘common sense’ issue when he requested that Rep. Rosa DeLauro stay away from the House Chambers during Halloween. “We just don’t need any further scares after this Ebola stuff from last year,” said the Speaker during a recent CNN interview concerning the lingering NFL and threat and the effect it could still have on Congressional elections next year.
In a startling revelation today, a congressional investigation was launched to examine whether a KGB officer played right field for the Dodgers in the NLCS.
Still facing fallout over a phone call he placed to the widow of a Green Beret killed in Niger last week that many deemed insensitive, Donald Trump sought to mend fences with the family today by sending a Subway party sub to their home.
With famous parents, you have the advantage of not needing to beat around the bush and pretend to be considerate of their feelings; you can just ask them for a job!
For decades, the pen industry has been using women as plentiful source of blue ink; with a typical ratio, of one menstruation to a thousand ballpoints. Sadly ‘Bodyform’ sanitary towels are insisting that ladies abandon their traditional blue hue for an unconvincing red, just like Tony Blair. As we now know, human female DNA has...
Tweet Tower—President Trump is finally shifting to center. He has a plan to pitch some political compromises in the hopes of luring democrats toward his nefarious agenda. The President wants to utilize green energies to increase our military prowess and expand our nuclear arsenal. Trump said, “Just think if nuclear bombs could be created more efficiently, like by wind power.…
Corporate bosses are quietly investing in hordes of sophisticated autonomous robot workers to replace us.
Miami, FL – (
Rep. Frederica Wilson (D-Fla.) on Wednesday welcomed the news that George Zimmerman was finally arrested, 45 days after he shot and killed Trayvon Martin in Florida, but continued to blame racial profiling as a cause of Martin’s death, and called for a broad discussion on this issue to avoid future tragedies.
Mars, New Hampshire – (

Nutrition experts at candy company M&M Mars have released the newest weight lost method to hit the market: the M&M’s diet. Selections from an interview with company spokesman, Skip Jackson, are listed below:
In response to the Trump administration dropping healthcare subsidies, Hooba Canoes Industries is announcing that we will astronomically raise your health plan rates beyond what you can afford.
Buckingham Castle (UK) – (
Royal watchers were astounded after a royal edict came down that forbid Prince Charles from attending any parade or inspection functions at any military bases across Britain. This is in response to public furor aver a recent tabloid article published on Wednesday.
Tom Seether, well into his late thirties, works at Middlemen Incorporated, a company dedicated to providing services for “middle men”.  He’s disgruntled now.
Cowplains, IL – (

A white lesbian woman who sued after she was accidentally impregnated with the sperm of an African American man will be forced to refile the lawsuit after an Illinois judge tossed out her claim against the sperm bank as a frivolous and stupid lawsuit.
Satire World Campsite….
Gather round kiddies and old Uncle Bargis is going to tell you a bed time tale about how evil Democrats have really screwed up politics in the good old USA!
How’s About Some Gun Control………….
Sure, lets enact a true “Law on Firearms and Ammunition.” This law will require anyone who owns a firearm, or who wants to own a firearm in the future, to register their intentions with our Federal authorities and apply for a simple permit and a universal Firearm ID card.
Italy: "I just called Comcast and asked if there's an extra charge for Rome-ing? ...Hello? What are you? An audience or a Michelangelo painting?"

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