Check Please!
Hollywood, CA – (

They flaunt themselves on big and small screens and draw legions of fans and admirers. But just how glamorous are these over-paid and ego filled stars in real life?
Saying that he cannot work in an environment full of women who are merely competent in their jobs, President-elect Donald Trump has chosen Washington-area hottie Candy McKitten, 22, as secretary of office.
Britney Spears is thirty-five today. We celebrate this occasion by recalling some of the more what-the-fuck-moments from her career. At 22, Britney married her childhood pal Jason Alexander in Las Vegas, Nevada, after a night of twinkie abuse and huffing glue. This ill-considered marriage, which was annulled or something like that in fifty-five hours, was the first in an epic series of oops-I-shit-the-bed-again moments Ms. Spears provided a gobsmacked nation for more than a year. The Pug Bus, which was then still a pup and apt to shit the bed itself, followed Britney's every swerve.
ARIES Mar 20 - Apr 19
Mistletoe, but not the berries, are well starred in any lip, tongue or nose touching endeavours this month. (The optimal hanging height in any kissing based festive intrigue is 6ft 9in unless your aunt is still seeing that professional basketball player in which the height is 3 ft higher.)y
Postcards from the Pug Bus, the alt-right's favorite satire site, discusses the difference between the Roman and the Nazi salutes. You can't tell the players without this scorecard. Don't raise your arm without it.
NEW YORK, New York (The Adobo Chronicles, Washington Bureau) - President-elect Donald Trump's phone conversations with world leaders have created jitters among members of the diplomatic community. Trump's unorthodox and naive calls with, for instance, the leaders of Pakistan and Kazakhstan may have put the United States' official position on and relationships with the two countries at…
Beesville Chamber of Commerce – (
Burt Hannon is a fun-filled individual and a business owner who just happens to own Burt’s House of Fun, a magic store and practical joke shop located on Bardsville Road in Beeville, Texas. Today Burt isn’t laughing, especially after he checked out of All Merciful Saints General Hospital after being beaten by a dozen irate prank victims on Monday!
Thugs, models, people dying from thirst, even God are all sipping on this classic drink. Grab a glass before it's too late!
Citizens of Aleppo have discovered that a brutal review written by @CandyMom81, is infinitely more hurtful than an oppressive fundamentalist regime; criticising hotels for their lack of ‘gluten-free tea bags’, ripe melon balls and hypoallergenic flak jackets.
In a bow to our supposed new President, I submit this missive attempting to recreate the style of communicating that Donald Trump does best, in order to express myself properly to those who elected him.
I hereby declare that I do not wish to be known as a white person any longer. White person is a slave owner's term, and I do not want to be shackled by that sorry association. All future references to me, therefore, should say that I am a person of white©.
Is Labour leader Jeremy Corbyn actually a deep cover Tory mole on a mission to destroy the party from within? Academic makes sensational claims that supposed left winger is actually trying to alienate voters to ensure Tory hegemony.
I’ve spent five fifty on this frothy thing, and I don’t feel I’m getting my goddamned money’s worth out of the transaction.
The Pentagon – (
Today, the Obama administration appointed Dr. Strangelove to be “Ebola Czar”. Strangelove, who once worked for the Pentagon as Chief Science Adviser in the 1960’s, is still vibrant and unconventional as he was 50 some years ago says Gen. Jack D. Ripper of the Strategic Air Command. Strangeloves’s signature wheelchair and cigarette are still the same, but his thick glasses are missing due to a double eye implant he received in 1985.
Christie, the current Governor of New Jersey, would be America's first ambassador to the island nation since it was invented by Trump this morning.
One of the main benefits of online dating is niche dating. If there's a certain type of person you're into, there's a dating site out there for you.
President-elect Donald Trump is to erect a huge thermometer to the side of the White House in order to show when he has made America great again.

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