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Local Area Telemarketer Mark Mandel was oddly receptive to the woos of the TelCore employee appreciation Monday...
Washington, DC – (satireworld.com)

Sources in the highest levels of the FBI are privately saying that an arrest warrant was issued for Democratic Presidential candidate, and former First Lady, Hillary Clinton after reports of Justice Department Secretary Lynch was caught at a secret meeting with Bill Clinton.
"When an American drone kills someone it is always killing a person representing a clear and present danger to the United States, and never innocent people," declared Obama at an afternoon press conference.
A Cuyahoga County employee, Jackson Fromm, has filed a lawsuit against the County Auditor's office, alleging that workplace conditions, in
particular jokes frequently shared by staff members, aggravate a medical condition from which he suffers, synesthesia.
In the middle of a rather uncivil war, Jeremy Corbyn has seen over half of his Shadow Cabinet resign, and even some of the replacements have since stepped down. Desperate times call for desperate measures, which must be why Corbyn was spotted with a clipboard, pleading for people to join the Cabinet.
‘All you need to do is look at the man and the claim certainly passes the eye test,’ said political analyst Dick Skinner. ‘He’s a rubbery mass of ineptitude.’
OTTAWA, Canada (The Adobo Chronicles, San Francisco Bureau) - People Magazine is known for its international list of top celebrities and professions -- from the 'Most Beautiful Women,' to 'Sexiest Doctor Alive' to "Most Influential Men and Women on Earth.' In its upcoming, special double-issue, the magazine has named the 'Sexiest Male Models Alive.' That's right -- models…
England and Man City forward Raheem Sterling has taken to social media to remind England fans that while he may well be totally shit at playing association football…he is actually a totally shit association footballer who can afford encrusted bathroom fixtures and still have enough cash left over to fill his drive with a fleet...
  The Fourth Circle of Hell—Many are questioning the devil’s decision to host the first presidential debate. What’s even more disturbing for some is Lucifer’s choice to hold the event in the Fourth Circle. Dante’s Hell has a total of 9 Circles, and 4 bathrooms, but recent national polling indicates the majority of Americans feel the debate should be held in…
Today, Fox News announced it wanted to host a presidential debate between Republican Donald Trump and Democrat Hillary Clinton in Benghazi, Libya. The spurious news network declared it would be the perfect place for Trump and...
(Profane Language Warning) Those Brits did something bold and almost inconceivable by voting to withdraw from the European Union but what exactly does that mean for us in the rest of the entire world, AKA The USA?
Boston, MA – (SatireWorld.com)

Taking a page from General Custer, Mass-hole Senator Elizabeth Warren tried to circle her wagons after she was outed over her claims she was a minority Indian Maiden which afforded her special affirmative action perks during her rise to the 1%.
Not much is known of the new candidate, but members of the Parliamentary Labour Party are said to be immensely impressed with her political ideology as well as her charisma and leadership ability.
LONDON, United Kingdom (The Adobo Chronicles, Berlin Bureau) - The U.K.-based pharmaceutical giant, GlaxoSmithKline (GSK) -- the world's fifth largest -- announced today that it has developed the most powerful weight loss pill ever. GSK expects to start marketing the new drug in the next few weeks, starting in Europe. The new drug, called Brexit, is…
Does 'Leave' Campaign Have Contingency Plans to Launch Military Coup in Event of 'Remain' Victory in EU Referendum? Sensational Claims that Farage and Other Brexit Leaders Plotting to Seize Power!
The Arlington cat show and 4-paws expo has drawn attention by the EPA this week...
The decision was made as part of a campaign to lower suicide rates in North Korea, who currently have the second highest suicide rates in the world. Anyone who attempts suicide, and fails, will now face an embarrassing and painful death on North Korean television.
The vote came as part of a snap referendum to help take Brits’ minds off the absolute political chaos going on in Westminster, where headless chickens and politicians are virtual indistinguishable.
NEW YORK, New York (The Adobo Chronicles, Washington Bureau) - In no time, both presidential candidates Donald Trump and Hillary Clinton will be announcing their vice presidential running mates. Clinton has been rumored lately to be gravitating towards Senator Elizabeth Warren who has been seen campaigning with the former Secretary of State. As for Trump, it…
OTTAWA, Canada (The Adobo Chronicles, Washington Bureau) - Two of the world's best-looking and sexiest heads of state did what wasn't expected of them while in Ottawa, Canada.  They stripped down to their shorts. Yes, we're talking about Canadian Prime Minister Justin Trudeau and Mexican President Jose Peña Nieto. But no worries, it's not what you're…

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