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Britons vent anger at government's incompetent handling of pandemic by garroting, burning and hacking to death ministers in violent online game. Virtual mobs seek head of Boris Johnson in order to secure victory. Has game inspired real life vigilantes to chase Covid-deniers and lockdown sceptics up trees?
British public warned of existence of a new, more virulent strain of Boris Johnson. Women warned to stay at home as new slicker, less buffoonish Boris mutation poses greater threat of impregnation. Boris Johnson deniers dismiss new variant as 'scare tactic', claim original is actually shaved ape.
US public demands to know where Batman was during Capitol insurrection? Absence of superheroes during Trump terrorists' attempt at sedition criticised as comic book nerds ask whether suppressed Michael Moore Justice League movie predict coup attempt?
LONDON--Dr. Kal Memon at the CHI Saint Lawrence Pediatric Research Hospital said this week that recent research has shown that developing babies can reap great benefits from light to moderate shaking a few times a week. "Brief, lightly intense shaking can release hormones in the brain that stimulate and accelerate intellectual development," Memon explained, "But…
LANDOVER, Maryland--Dr. Theodore Jennings, a behavioral psychology researcher at the King-White Institute, has authored a report showing that sustained, dehumanizing childhood bullying is still the best and most effective way to unleash telekinetic abilities in children. "In spite of years of lab studies in which researchers have attempted to utilize logic games and puzzles to…
SALT LAKE CITY, Utah--Speaking today at the Favored Children's Conference at Brigham Young University, Our Heavenly Father shed light on a topic that has been heavily debated over the past decade: how effective are thoughts and prayers? The remarks came in response to comments during a panel on plagues, when a young woman began her…
Are you one of the millions of Americans opposed to getting a COVID-19 inoculation? You might get one anyway according to a source who says the US government has started to slip the vaccine into your injectable drugs, cigarettes and even favorite junk foods.
































































 
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Administrators of Baby Goose Steps, a pre-school dedicated to the early education of Nazi children since its founding in 1987, denounced the attack that left its north entryway defaced with a menorah and Star of David.
































































 
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We spoke with former President Donald Trump about his legacy, life after the presidency, and his soon to be released fictional memoir, Trump Change: The Greatest Presidency of all Time. Q: You wrote this memoir under a pseudonym, DJ Trump. Why? A: There are some kiss and tell moments. Some dirty little secrets, like the…
Former President Donald Trump's opinion of his impeachment defense has reportedly slipped further after his own attorneys began to argue in favor of conviction on the Senate Floor this afternoon.
































































 
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(ATLANTA, GA)--Dr. Inger Damon with the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention announced earlier today that recent computer models warn of a new surge of COVID-19 variants, and that if it were real and still existed, the town of Mayberry would have already been wiped out by the dreaded disease. Dr. Damon warns that the…
WASHINGTON DC--Embattled Republican Congresswoman Marjorie Taylor Greene responded strongly to her detractors, both inside the US House of Representatives and in the media, by returning her focus to working for her constituents in Georgia. "These morons may have voted to remove me from various committees," Greene said, "But that only allows me to turn my…
GameStop shares skyrocketed in afterhours trading today after posting earnings of $32 per share, more than justifying the stock's recent meteoric rise.



































































 
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Hey, there. Remember me? Of course you do. Who could forget the best President of all time? From my big, beautiful wall to Space Force to reversing the wrongs committed against Lil Wayne, I truly made America great again. It's no wonder the Democrats impeached me twice. They were just jealous!
With Joe Biden's radical left-wing policies soon to be transforming the country into a communist dystopia, we can expect our lives to look profoundly different in the near future. The following are some helpful tips to surviving (and thriving!) in America's new socialist era.
If you call tech support these days, you get a menu of three choices: Some chappie with a rogan-josh Indian accent telling you, "My name is Brian"; or a low rider who talks faster than his relatives run when they're caught stealing electricity; or some Vietnamese ex-hooker who calls you "Feel," when your real name is Phil.
Billed as a gesture of Donald Trump's appreciation to those who have supported him over the past 5 years, spokesman Dennis Diallo stated that the future The Homes at MAGAville in Winter Springs, Florida will boast the same luxury and style that developments bearing the President's name are known for, but at prices his middle-class base can afford.
Domenic Brooks, 52, formerly a salesman at Rod's Tote and Float RV and Boat Outlet in Durham, will now serve as Head F***stick of the same dealership after posting videos of himself taking part in the pro-Donald Trump insurrection, his boss Rod Towson confirmed.
Reduced to using smoke signals to communicate with the outside world, President Trump caused some confusion amongst his followers this morning with a message to "storp the capital".
Trump, whose behavior has grown increasingly erratic since his election loss to Joe Biden last month, reportedly ordered the poisoning of over 40 members of his inner-circle - including his wife Melania and his sons Donald Jr. and Eric – then the White House burned as he fled aboard Marine One.

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